A surprise in the mail

I came home from a particularly difficult day at the doctor's office to find a package sitting outside my apartment door. (and kudos to the postal carrier who came up to my apartment instead of leaving a notice for me to pick it up at the post office, since the package didn't quite fit in my mailbox. He knows I have mobility issues, and so my hats off to him for saving me the trip)

So, I picked up the package wondering what it could be as I wasn't expecting anything in the mail. And to my great surprise and joy, I was gifted with a used, but beautiful strop from a member here! Thank You Ivan. I can only assume you got my address from another generous member here who sent me a honed and stropped shave ready razor to start my straight shaving journey.

I am deeply moved by this generosity. I have a had a very difficult two years, not the worst of which was losing my job recently. And so these acts of human kindness really mean a lot to me. I hesitate to share these next pieces, and I won't go into too much detail, but the last two years have been a bit of nightmare for me. Quite the challenge. Two years ago, I was diagnosed with a chronic and degenerative disease. I was with the love of my life at the time and she was nothing less than gorgeous and supportive through it all. But then, one night, nearly a year and a half ago, I lost her to a drunk driver. She lived about an hour outside the city and was on her way to see me, when a drunk, driving too fast and in the wrong lane hit her head on, and I have not been able to get over the guilt. She was coming to see me.
The stress of all this is hard on my disease, and it may have created a flare up that I haven't been able to really "flare down" since. Losing my job, doesn't compare to losing her. And it's only been recently that I have been able to come out of my despair over losing her. ( I think) I'll never meet another like her. And some days, all I want to do is join her, but I know that isn't the right thing to do and she would want me to fight for my life. So most days, I do, to honour her.

Anyway, these gifts from members here have made me grateful and have touched me deeply. Even though this illness has eaten all my savings, and I'm living at a below poverty line level, I am still hopeful. That some day I will find my way back to work and be well enough to do so, although my doctor doesn't even want me thinking about working right now. And given my condition right now, I suppose he is right. Nothing lasts forever they say. So I still hold out hope that I will be able to work again.

Sorry for the depressing story guys. But, I wanted you to know why this means so much to me; it really means more than you could know to have been gifted like this; the kindness of you so called 'strangers' astounds me.

Thank you Ben. Thank you Ivan. Thanks to everyone who has been so kind and generous with their knowledge of all things straight shaving. It's been a blessing signing up as a member here, and reading all this info is distracting in a really good way. Thanks again.

Bless all your kind hearts.

I read this, then came back and read it again. You have NO idea what your story has just done for me, but thank you. I first want to wish you all the best in finding your way back to good health, after that everything will fall right back into place for you. You were lucky to have met and spent time with such a beautiful human being and as bad as it sounds , I'm sure she felt just as lucky to have been with you. The pain you feel for your loss is just a reminder of what a wonderful person she was and you should look at it as just that.
As for the folks that have helped you here,,,,that is what this place is about. People helping others just because. Not so they can advertise in a post that they are willing to help, but because they ARE willing to help WITHOUT the advertising. When they see others that need help they jump out and do without the asking. Lately I have seen far too many posts with the disguise of being helpful simply to cover up other intentions. I normal do not get involved in controversial posts and I do not want to hijack yours.
I wish you all the best and know that you WILL come out of all this that is holding you back, just because good things do happen to good people. And to those that helped you, I too thank you for what you did for this man and for being a part of our community.

thank you so much for posting this. i am usually very cynical when human nature is observed or concerned. you have let some light into my heart. shined some light on generous people doing good things and having such a profound effect. you are in my thoughts. thank you who ever did this and thank you new2cutthroats for posting thhis.

Thanks Mike and oftenfacetious.

I don't know if writing this brought up old wounds, or if they are still just really fresh, but I'm not ashamed to admit, the tears were streaming as I wrote this, because I don't think I can, or even ever want to find someone new. I don't think it would be fair to anyone new, as I know I'd be constantly wondering if they could ever measure up.

I dated a lot of great women...well, not " a lot", but the few I did love were incredible, but she was "the one". I knew it pretty quickly, too. And we always seemed to be on the same page. I miss her every day. I hope she's with my mother in heaven and that they are getting along just fine. They most likely are, as my girl was very easy to get along with; very easy.

And, I just wanted to say it was ben who sent me the razor from "across the pond", which arrived in surprisingly lightening fast speed. Mailed on a Friday, arrived the following wednesday, and Ivan who sent me the strop from NY state. Can't say how long it took, because I had no idea he was sending it in the first place; it was a complete surprise to me. And a great big thanks, again, to my letter carrier, who has to be one of the best in this city, for saving me a trip and leaving it at my door.


And also, if someone can tell me what Ivan's user name is, as for some reason, I thought Ivan was his user name, but apparently it's not; and I wanted to PM him to thank him.

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Originally Posted by New2CutThroats

And also, if someone can tell me what Ivan's user name is, as for some reason, I thought Ivan was his user name, but apparently it's not; and I wanted to PM him to thank him.

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Ivan = gugi :nj

Thank you so much for sharing, I understand how hard it can be to talk about things such as this, and I admire your courage.

I hope you have many a happy shave in your life and can find contentment and relief from both your loss and your disease.


I hope for you the best

~Josh

Thanks for sharing this. The gifts were commendable and your continuing to press on in the face of all your troubles is commendable. I wish you the very best and I'm sorry you had to go through the things you have.

Just keep on fighting. giving up is the easiest to do. if You need help ask i am sure SRP will be in there for You.

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Originally Posted by hi_bud_gl

Just keep on fighting. giving up is the easiest to do. if You need help ask i am sure SRP will be in there for You.

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Indeed it is, and knowing her, she'd want me to fight the good fight.
Thanks for the encouragement.

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Originally Posted by JokiJo

Thank you so much for sharing, I understand how hard it can be to talk about things such as this, and I admire your courage.

I hope you have many a happy shave in your life and can find contentment and relief from both your loss and your disease.


I hope for you the best

~Josh

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Thanks Josh.

Yeah, I never wanted to bring it up; attempts at humour are, according to some, a way for me to hide? :confused: And I sometimes write about her as if she were still alive. Her spirit is very much alive in me.
Who knows if I am really masking, I suppose we all are, in some areas of our lives, but the timing of that strop at the door after the day I had, compelled me to give some context. Aside from my being prone to ingrowns, I had decided to take up straight shaving, because spending 20 bucks on a pack of Mach 3 blades was consistently eating into my food budget. And I wanted to save money for bigger needs.
So, it was a bit of shock when I started looking at the prices of SRs, and the strops, which I can now understand, are the minimum needs when using a SR. Along with the soap and brush, of course, and I'm doing fine with a cheap synthetic brush and the williams soap. I'm learning to build a lather with less refined items, so when I can afford better ones, I should be well prepared. Although, I got some samples of shave cream from Lush, which I think they have in the states. I mix the cream with the williams, because I find the williams dries too fast on my face. So much so, I just lather half my face at a time.

Btw, I'm doing alright on that front, in terms of my shaves. I still have to "clean up" with a disposable cartridge, but they are getting closer and closer each time. Not BBS, but I have faith....one day>>>BBS. One day.
The various stropping videos on YouTube ( two I've seen from members here) have helped tremendously in avoiding harm to the blade, and the strop for that matter. I'm not incredibly speedy on the strop, and I'm a little more careful (slower) than I was on the jeans and newspaper, but it helped develop speed, so even though I've only had a real strop for a day, I had a lot of practice on stuff I had around my place. I never use much more than the weight of the blade to strop. I hope to get a stone or two one day and hope I'll be able to become adept at honing. I find, once I have a blade in my hand, my concentration levels shoot way up. And incredibly, I never have tremors shaving, or stropping. So I believe it will be the same way honing. I hope so. Although, I think I'll be way more nervous about using a hone on a razor for the first time, as it seems, to me at least, you can do far greater damage to your blade on a hone than a strop. I'll be watching hours of video before I ever touch a hone with a razor, for sure. I use to sharpen the knives in my childhood home, but sharpening knives is a whole other animal.

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Originally Posted by coachmike

I read this, then came back and read it again. You have NO idea what your story has just done for me, but thank you. I first want to wish you all the best in finding your way back to good health, after that everything will fall right back into place for you. You were lucky to have met and spent time with such a beautiful human being and as bad as it sounds , I'm sure she felt just as lucky to have been with you. The pain you feel for your loss is just a reminder of what a wonderful person she was and you should look at it as just that.

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Thanks Mike. I still sometimes catch myself thinking, speaking and writing about her as if she were still alive. I still remember her scent, and I never want to forget her smell. We actually were crazy about each other's natural scent. Part of me I suppose, is still in denial, and when I think about that night, I keep going back to her coming to see me, so I often write to her as if she were still here. I know we had a strong love, but I can't help thinking sometimes, if she had fallen in love with someone else, she would still be alive today.

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Originally Posted by coachmike

As for the folks that have helped you here,,,,that is what this place is about. People helping others just because. Not so they can advertise in a post that they are willing to help, but because they ARE willing to help WITHOUT the advertising. When they see others that need help they jump out and do without the asking. Lately I have seen far too many posts with the disguise of being helpful simply to cover up other intentions. I normal do not get involved in controversial posts and I do not want to hijack yours.
I wish you all the best and know that you WILL come out of all this that is holding you back, just because good things do happen to good people. And to those that helped you, I too thank you for what you did for this man and for being a part of our community.

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Yes, it was something I noticed almost immediately about the members here. The level of respect for different opinions and the generosity of sharing experiences, is something I have not often seen on internet forums, and it's quite amazing. Makes me hopeful, because before becoming a member, I felt I was becoming a bit cynical about human nature. And I usually try to be optimistic. These last couple of years have really challenged that optimism. I'm really glad I signed up, and not just because a couple of members helped me out, as I was happy to have signed up long before I was sent those items. I also wanted to thank a fellow Canuck Cove5440 for his offer of an Injector Razor. He noticed that I wondered if using a DE would be something I should use while waiting for ingrown bumps to heal. I declined his offer, because I felt, that now that I am no longer stropping on a pair of jeans and newspaper, I should be okay with the straight razor, plus I still have some cartridges I want to use up, and don't want to take from someone something I don't "need". Although, it can be argued that I don't "need" any of these gifts, but the offers and the gifts I did accept are greatly appreciated.

So thanks again, to ben, gugi, and cove5440. And thanks to all who have sent me PMs with words of encouragement. It feeds this heart broken soul, in unfathomable ways.

That was a very humbling & moving post JD. Without getting too gooey, your attitude is amazing. Your lack of self pity is awe inspiring, mate. Keep strong & positive & celebrate her life through your own determination to realise that life does go on.
People make choices in life & they can never know how these decisions will affect them down the line. She could have made different choices, but she didn't. Who knows how things would have been, but it appears to me that if she had fallen in love with another, she would have missed out on something that is rare & precious.
I hope that you can understand what I'm trying to say. This short post has taken a while to write. I really have struggled to express myself the way I want to, and have had to settle on this.

Touching story.

You've found a good community, fellow Canadian. I'm sure you'll experience even brighter days in the near future. The clouds will pass.

you are to be commended on your courage. do not give up. i also have been thru rough times and know how hard it can be. you seem to have your head and heart in the right place and things will get better..good luck...and you will always have friends here.

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Originally Posted by ben.mid

That was a very humbling & moving post JD. Without getting too gooey, your attitude is amazing. Your lack of self pity is awe inspiring, mate. Keep strong & positive & celebrate her life through your own determination to realise that life does go on.
People make choices in life & they can never know how these decisions will affect them down the line. She could have made different choices, but she didn't. Who knows how things would have been, but it appears to me that if she had fallen in love with another, she would have missed out on something that is rare & precious.
I hope that you can understand what I'm trying to say. This short post has taken a while to write. I really have struggled to express myself the way I want to, and have had to settle on this.

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I do. I do understand. Thanks Ben. The razor is working great btw.:tu You must have honed that baby well, because the shaves are getting better each time.

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Originally Posted by Blade Wielder

Touching story.

You've found a good community, fellow Canadian. I'm sure you'll experience even brighter days in the near future. The clouds will pass.

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Thanks BW.

As an aside, I came across your shaving video on YouTube a few weeks ago, and then realized it was yours when I saw it again, in the forums here last night. Great tune in the background, and man can you shave (that blade is awesome) but I think it's a song by Colin, something or other, ( I keep wanting to say C. James, but that's not the right one? And you mention that it's Alice Cooper?? So, either my ears are failing me, or you've changed the background music since posting, because I'm almost sure one of the Colin's is singing that song and not AC?? Can you clear up my confusion?)

AFAIK, the copyright people weren't happy with the original choice, so it did get changed. It's a great demo of how to handle a blade.

I hope it gives you many pleasant shaves. Thank-you for sharing with us.

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