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Thread: Clean jokes

  1. #1
    Senior Member Ernie1980's Avatar
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    Default Clean jokes

    how about sharing some good family friendly jokes? I will get started, and it's even forum related!

    What did one razor say to the other?

    - wow you are looking sharp today

    I know, I know...

    If you have one that's better share it here!
    hardblues and rolodave like this.

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    Senior Member blabbermouth ScoutHikerDad's Avatar
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    Sadly, I don't know any clean jokes.

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    There is no charge for Awesomeness Jimbo's Avatar
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    A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?"

    What is a ghost's favourite food? A sand-witch.

    How do you know an elephant has been in your fridge? The footprints in the jello.

    Why do doctors recommend you do not eat Christmas decorations? Because you'll get tinsel-itus.

    Why did the octopus blush? Because the sea weed.

    James.
    <This signature intentionally left blank>

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    How do you hide an elephant in a cherry tree?
    Paint its toenails red.
    Jimbo, hardblues and Hirlau like this.
    "Ignorance is preferable to error, and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing than he who believes what is wrong."-Thomas Jefferson (Notes on Virginia, 1782)

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    I thought elephant in the fridge was footprints in the butter?
    hardblues and Substance like this.
    "Ignorance is preferable to error, and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing than he who believes what is wrong."-Thomas Jefferson (Notes on Virginia, 1782)

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    Senior Member blabbermouth tintin's Avatar
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    what did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!

    two cannibals in a forest are eating a clown, the one says to the other,"does this taste funny to you?"

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    Senior Member Ernie1980's Avatar
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    What is the name of a man with no arms or legs that is laying in front of a door?

    -Matt

    what is the same man is floating in a pool?

    -Bob
    Jimbo and Phrank like this.

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    The Hurdy Gurdy Man thebigspendur's Avatar
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    The OP said clean jokes not ancient history stuff. The last time I heard some of these I think it was Henny Youngman who told them and he's been dead for 20 years.

    Har har.
    No matter how many men you kill you can't kill your successor-Emperor Nero

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    There is no charge for Awesomeness Jimbo's Avatar
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    This one is probably pushing it a little, but I remember my nieces and nephews loved it when they were 5 or 6.

    What do you call a man with 20 rabbits shoved up his butt? Warren.

    James.
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  12. #10
    barba crescit caput nescit Phrank's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ernie1980 View Post
    What is the name of a man with no arms or legs that is laying in front of a door?

    -Matt

    what is the same man is floating in a pool?

    -Bob
    What is the name of two guys with no arms and legs standing each side of a window?

    - Kurt and Rod

    What is the name of a man with no arms or legs that is lying beside a hole in the ground?

    - Doug

    What is the name of a man with no arms or legs that lying inside a hole in the ground?

    - Phil

    What is the name of a man with no arms or legs stuck to the wall?

    - Art

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