WD-40 is your preferred pre-shave oil.
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WD-40 is your preferred pre-shave oil.
...you keep a roll of toilet paper by the sink to use as styptic pencil.
...your last set of scales, are from bones found by your grandpas grave site, in the back of the house.
...your scales bear a striking resemblance to your snakeskin boots.
Now I must say I rightly don't have the ability to contemplate why you fellas want to make a list of things folks in these parts have been a doin for generations now. We don't take kindly to you city slickers makin fun of us like that. Just because cousin Festus shaves his pet goat baaabeee with his straight don't mean nothing. And she be real particular about the razor and soap and be able to eyeball that bevel rite quick.
There be nothing like good old fashioned horse sense to guide you in your life. You folks just don't know the pleasure of gettin an expert shave from Miss Hogslapper at our town tonsorial parlor. Why we use the same brush and soap and razor on every customer. Yea those Govt men come snooping around but we know how to take care of them. They never come back.
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Totally 'gree. We gon' fix that fellas, fix 'em good.
The only time you would shave is if you had to go to court.
...your shaving brush is made from porcupine.
We done tried all manner of critters round here. Old Pete tried a porcupine and got his eye taken out and Rufus tried a Possum and he swore he was dead before he done mess with it but it come alive and jumped up and bit off part of his anatomy.
...your preferred aftershave is Eau de Possum.
...you use a branding iron instead of a styptic pencil.
.........your scuttle doubles as your spittoon.
Ooops, sorry. All that Southern Comfort I hads me fo'brekfast, done cloud me thik'in.
....your boot spurs double as your straight razor
........if your drawers double as your hot towels.
....your mullet is your strop
... you've ever thought of designing a miniature reel mower to shave with.
....if you look at the car rusting on your front lawn and think, 'I can make a razor from that'!
Your Scythe is razor sharp!
...your razor stand sits atop a Sears & Roebuck catalog.
I don't know...He has a bit of a part to play in the disc world book 'Reaper Man' by Terry Patchett. Why he even uses a gentle breeze in an effort to get the best possible edge on his Scythe :)
Mick