Oh The Embarrassment

So here I am this morning shaving as usual and talking to my wife at the same time (my first mistake) and I choose my case red imp. I usually stay away from that one because its got this wierd ultra sharp spike point which flares outwards and is very easy to commit hari kari with. So I'm shaving and my wife says to me, "what did you do to your neck"? So I said what do you mean and she says look in the mirror and there's this 3 inch red line going across my neck. Not much blood more of a scratch really but it looks terrible. I'm still trying to figure out how I did that. Well, I know how I did that it's that damn wierd spike point. (they don't call it a RED Imp for nothing)

So the moral of the story is don't divide your attention while shaving (something I already knew) and now I'll really avoid that razor in my rotation. Well actually I won't avoid it but I'll be real careful with it.

When Sunday mornin’ comes around
My Pa hangs up his strop,
An’ takes his razor out an’ makes
It go c’flop! c’flop!
An’ then he gits his mug an’ brush
An yells t’ me "Behave!"
I tell y’u things is mighty still--
When Pa begins t’ shave.

Then Pa he stirs his brush around
An’ makes th’ soapsuds fly;
An’ sometimes, when he stirs too hard,
He gits some in his eye.
I tell y’u, but it’s funny then,
To see Pa stamp and rave;
But you mus’n’t git ketched laffin’--
When Pa begins t’ shave.

Th’ hired hand he dassent talk,
An’ even Ma’s afeard,
An’ y’u can hear the razor click
A-cuttin through Pa’ beard!
An then my Uncle Bill he laffs
An’ says: ‘Gosh! John, you’re brave;"
An’ Pa he swears, an Ma jest smiles-
When Pa begins t’ shave.

When Pa gits done a-shavin’ of
His face, he turns around,
And Uncle Bill says: "Why, John,
Y’ur chin looks like ploughed ground!"
An’ then he laffs—jest laffs an’ laffs,
But I got t’ behave,
Cos things is apt t’ happen quick—
When Pa begins t’ shave!

Harry Douglas Robins

From – The Vanishing American Barber Shop-An Illustrated History of
Tonsorial Art, 1860-1960, Ronald S. Barlow 1993 p.84

Thanks Scott, you just added a book to my wish list :)

Does every squared-off razor qualify as a spike point? If so, almost all my razors are spikes and I've never had anything bad happen. What exactly are you supposed to watch out for with spikes? That the end might "bridge" over and slice a part of your face you're not shaving?

It all depends some of them look almost rounded over on the spike end and some are rather square and sharp. The sharpest one at the corner I have is my DD #1 and it’s the one that I got my check with a few weeks back. I just shaved with it again yesterday and was able to avoid the mistake of a few weeks ago.

Ouch. I didn't check, but weren't you the one that gave an axiom of never letting anyone watch in another post ;)? Thanks for the reinforcement!

I feel your pain. I can still use the excuse of newbiness...one of my first shaves I spiked myself just in front of my ear on the down stroke...winced and paused...deep breath...start again...immediately duplicated the feat just below the first! And this a day after I'd peeled an inch of hide from my jaw line on the same side. My wife was nowhere around so I can only blame my own ineptitude at the time. Good thing, 'cause she'd 'ave screamed and then I probably would have flinched and taken off my ear. Boy am I glad I've improved...and healed. I have since rounded that spike (inexpensive razor and less heirloom value than the value of saving my face!).

- Dale