or the Soaps response to Musing on the Razor.
Well… I know that it started out as a thought allowed to run its course just for the sake of a writing class and I thought I’d share it here. However, apparently, the times being as they are, I wasn’t prepared for the dogged response from soap demanding equal time. Now it is not in my nature to intentionally slight a given side of an issue, but I felt that I was not quite the person to relay the point of view of soap, so I tried to quietly bow away. But I think that my grandfather and great grandfather would not look kindly towards me not sharing with others the way they shared with me. Then there is also the fact that the soap would not relent. So in an effort to assist, here is the soap…
Note: Personally, I think that it’s more along the lines of a rant. Although, the soap might actually have a gripe.
Finally! Someone that listens to us. The razors get all the glory. They talk? Well of course they talk. We all do. But it seems like only the razors get heard. Just let one of them try to do their job without us. We do twice the amount of work as the razor, and some of us do three. I guess there are as many types of us as there is of them; and I suppose we range in ability from useless to the overvalued, just the same as them. But seriously? The razors wouldn’t be able to do their job without us. Ok… maybe a very select few might… might… be able and then only with the help of Masters. You just let one of those new guys try to shave without soap to ease the way. Hamburger.
Now let’s just put it like this. A guy gets into the shower and he uses one of my cousins to actually clean his face. That alone gets rid of any debris that could (heaven forbid) damage the razors edge. And that’s where the process starts. So now this guy gets out of the shower and is preparing to shave and what’s he do? If he’s smart, he gets me out and mixes up a fine froth of bubbles. And that’s another thing. We can all make bubbles, but only certain kinds of us can make what you need to shave. Now some of my brothers think an awful lot of themselves and they get the job done, but each to their own. I’m a bit more of the “run of the mill” type. I make my bubbles, and I can hold my liquid with the best of them and that’s what you really need.
Sorry. I started off on a tangent there. You mustn’t let me run off like that.
So, this guy has got this nice bunch of my bubbles mixed up and goes to smearing it on his face. Now this is a something we soaps don’t really talk about. When we get smeared on like that, it doesn’t really do anything. The guy has to take his time and really work those bubbles around. Sort of like he’s trying to rub it in. See, those bubbles we make hold water against the skin and hair and the hair starts to soak it up. So after a couple of minutes, our guy takes a wet hot towel and lays it over his face and soaks up the bubbles. Between our cousin in the shower, this first round of bubbles, and the warmth from the towel, we’ve got the start of making things easy for the… razor. The guy is ready to put on the second coat of bubbles. Now the idea of a coat is pretty appropriate considering what they do. They help protect the skin from the… razor… as well as making things slick so the razor can slide. They also hold the moisture in the hair. And yes, I have to admit that some of my brothers are lazy and don’t hold their liquid as long as some of us. You just have to find some of my more reputable brothers that can hold their water longer. There are even some who also have a bit extra in them that help leave the skin softer even after the razor has finished.
So don’t let those… razors… whisper in your ear and fool you into thinking that they’re the end all of shaving. They may cut the hair, but that’s all they do. Speaking for all of my brothers, sisters, and cousins; Thank you for your support.
