I just had a very profound experience!

Well folks, I just thought I would share an experience I just had.

Recently I have been experimenting with methods of emotional release (letting go of negative emotions, etc). Anyway, I have always been highly skeptical, my opinion being that the majority of techniques do not have a chance in hell of working!

Today I started a program called "The Abundance Program" created by Larry Crane, so I started listening to the CDs. Anyway, I get to CD 2 and start the first exercise which is as follows:

1. Think about a negative situation in your life (Trouble with a colleague, etc).
2. Move this thought down into the chest/stomach area.
3. Imagine the negative energy leaving your body.

However, I could not find anything negative to think about in the present. I’m very happy with my life. However, like most people I do have demons from my past, so I decided to try and work with one of my demons. Rather foolishly, I settled upon the one that causes me the most distress: a form of abuse that I received as a child. This is a memory that makes me feel very physically uncomfortable. However, I felt that the technique being so simple it could not hurt to try it. I should point out that I was highly skeptical at this point -- how could something so ridiculously simple have any effect?

I complete step 1, I bring the thought to my mind – I start to feel that horrible shiver that runs from your brain down through your body; the shiver that comes through thinking about things that have hurt us. Anyway, this is probably the most distressing memory I have.

I complete step 2, moving the energy down into my chest and stomach. This is when something strange happens, the energy turns really fuzzy. That’s the only way I can describe it; like a TV that is not tuned properly. It was a really odd, static sensation.

I try and complete step 3. It felt like the energy rushed out of me. I suddenly felt drained, like I was going to pass out. My hands are very cold and clammy; I’m shivering and suffering palpitations. It still feels like there are little shocks of energy rushing over my body.

This probably sounds like hocus-pocus rubbish. However, I'm feeling really strange about it all. I'm usually the first to call these programs and self-help techniques rubbish, but this has really got to me.

I never thought some 15 second exercise could provoke such a reaction!

I think it's great that you're working on that stuff. I can't comment on the specific "program" you have there, but sometimes just bringing awarness to those feelings and thoughts, recognizing and accepting them - instead of turning away in one way or another - is very healthy. Best of luck.

Jordan

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Originally Posted by Paddington

However, I could not find anything negative to think about in the present. I’m very happy with my life. However, like most people I do have demons from my past...

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First of all, I'm sincerely happy for you that you've had a profound experience about dealing with old demons. I really understand what it's like to have demons your childhood that keep resurfacing. I wish I didn't, but I do.

That being said, your quote up there really gives me pause. There is nothing negative in your life right now. Not a thing. Yet, you're looking for ways to deal with negative things that aren't there. That doesn't seem healthy.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to talk down you or your experience, but I'm trying to point out that there might be more to look at.

I've seen some awful stuff. This isn't the place to discuss it, but trust me, been down hard roads. What I've found, and I hope you'll do some serious thinking about, is that every bad thing in life can be lumped into one of three categories, and I can sort them pretty darn fast.

a. Stuff that I have plenty of control over. That stuff is simple. You just deal with it. Life is good if everything falls in this category.

b. Stuff I don't have control over, but could if I worked at it. This is stuff like paying off my student loans, getting into a place where I can feel good about getting married again, that sort of stuff. I can't wave a magic wand, but I can think and plan and work hard and make it happen eventually. I like this stuff actually. This is the stuff that makes us strong. Regular old every day adversity that we have to work hard to overcome, but that we CAN overcome.

c. Stuff that you have no control over and never will. This category sucks. I've got some memories in this category. You betcha. I'm guessing from your post that you do too. I feel your pain. Once you recognize that something falls in this category, you've only got two ways to deal with it; let it poison you, or let it go. When I say let it go, I mean COMPLETELY.

Your technique isn't something that would work for me, but if it works for you, then that's fantastic. (I've found my own ways).

The important thing here, as with anything that you do to let these things go, is to make sure you really are letting them go. Getting them out of your heart soul and mind. It's easy to just shift our thoughts and feelings about old demons around, find a lighter place to carry them, without ever letting go of them. Just make sure you don't make that mistake.

Thank you for your considerate reply VeeDubb65, I really appreciate you taking the time to respond in such a detailed manner. Childhood demons can be a real problem; however, I have always just reframed the experiences in my mind – I think this is why they have had little influence over my present state of mind.

However, I feel I should explain something. I have recently started seeing my father again; however, this has brought up some unpleasant reflection. I’m very happy with how my life has turned out, but I would still like to make my peace with the man. I don’t think it would cause me any emotional harm to just leave these feelings alone, but I intend to try and deal with them anyway, because as Jordan pointed out, it is healthy.

The strange thing is I’m not sure if the technique helped me let go of the emotion. The physical feeling though, was extremely alien. The emotion became irrelevant in terms of the experience.

I think you have a good solid system for categorizing your emotions. I would say I have 99% of my life under control, though I think I may be tempted to replace the word control – more of an understanding of my place in the whole scheme of things and the knowledge that I can develop these situations if necessary.

I’m really not sure what this technique – if it can be called that – even is. Though I can honestly say I have never experienced anything like it. Very strange stuff!

Thanks again for a great post!

If you've got 99% of your life under control, then I'd say you're doing better than 99% of your peers. :rofl2:


Seriously though, just remember with the whole reestablishing contact thing, that your father is who he is, and was who he was (which may or may not be the same thing) and there's not a single thing you can do about either. It's an accept it at face value or let it go situation.

Either way, best of luck on your journey.

That is a classic meditation technique and it works wonderfully in any context.

One example I like starts with the basic breathing meditation where you focus on your breathing. Don't regulate it or anything just focus on it, listen to it as you breath in and out. Feel your body respond as you take in air then exhale it. Once you feel the pattern and have fully relaxed imagine your body as a big balloon. Filling with air completely when you breath in then emptying completely when you breath out.

I am no mystic but when I get to that state I can feel my mind/body expelling the stress of the day. I imagine all the tension from the day being pushed out of my body. As if it was water pouring in with each breath, washing thru me then flushing out the stress. In some cases (much like the exercise you did) I picture individual instances or situations that caused me stress.

Like I said I'm no mystic and trying to explain it is hard but I'm not focusing on the stress of the day but on the breathing. imagining the stress and tension being washed away by it. After five to ten minutes of that I feel like I've had a nice relaxing nap and am ready to take on the rest of my day.

It is amazing what taking a break, closing your eyes and relaxing can do for your mind. Listen to your body, let your mind wander free (almost like sleeping) and see where it takes you.

Oh duh.... the alien feeling you experienced is most likely something that has been repressed for so long you can't even recognize it. Not so much the event, as it is what triggered it when you focused on it, but how you feel or felt about it. It takes a lot of soul searching to be able to see something from so far in our past and really deal with it. To understand the emotions involved and what they've mutated into after so long being repressed.

I am fond of negative feelings. i would never want to let them go, they are so helpful for getting motivated and accomplishing things.

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Originally Posted by jockeys

I am fond of negative feelings. i would never want to let them go, they are so helpful for getting motivated and accomplishing things.

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I don't know that letting go means getting rid of them exactly (IMHO) - integrating them or processing them so one does not deal with them in a maladaptive, unconscious or reactive way would be the goal. If you use them for positive motivation - and are aware of it, that is one way of integration I suppose. :)

Jordan

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Originally Posted by jnich67

I don't know that letting go means getting rid of them exactly (IMHO) - integrating them or processing them so one does not deal with them in a maladaptive, unconscious or reactive way would be the goal. If you use them for positive motivation - and are aware of it, that is one way of integration I suppose. :)

Jordan

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well, the way i see it, you've got two choices:
you can let the negative feelings just fester inside you, ruining your day and maybe eventually your health,
OR you can put 'em to work and use your anger or whatever to accomplish things to improve your life.

example:
let's say one of my coworkers does something slimy and backstabs me. ****es me right off. i can:
a. sit around moping and fuming, and not do anything about it. then i will go home and be in an awful mood and my wife will have to put up with my irate behavior.
b. use my anger to one up/ humiliate him at the next meeting or whatever by using my focused rage to work faster and get more done than him. the satisfaction of dazzling the boss with my fine oneupsmanship will see me going home in a victorious mood, and my wife will get to deal with happy jockeys and not cranky jockeys.
or, i suppose,
c. do some hippy meditation thing (no offense, anyone) which does nothing to resolve the situation with the antagonist, just makes me less cranky. when i go home that evening, my wife won't find me cranky, but she won't respect me, either.

my point is, rather than just wasting all your anger or whatever, you should use it (or use it up) to improve the quality of your life in a constructive way. even if it's just beating a punching bag, it's still a good workout and helps your feel better physically and emotionally. i see that transcendental stuff as an awful waste of something potentially useful.

I'm on the same page as Jockey.

Red

I think jockey has a valid point, but there's a fine line.

Using anger/hurt feelings/pain/etc as motivation can be a VERY good thing. But that would fall into the "b" category from my sorting idea. This creates 2 possible problems with doing things this way.


First of all, there are things that this simply doesn't work for. Specifically, things that no amount of work will ever give you the ability to change. This is the "c" category. Anybody who thinks that there is nothing that should ever fall into this category has had a sheltered life. Again, no offense intended, but let's be realistic here, we're talking about things like rape, child abuse, and witnessing horrendous things like murder and suicide.

Trying to use these sorts of experiences as your motivation is unhealthy. You end up basing your successes and failures on the worst thing that ever happened to you, and viewing the entire world through a warped lens.


The other danger with using these sorts of things as motivation, is that IMO, it's important to do it the right way and for the right reasons.

Your coworker stabs you in the back. Been there done that.

You work your tail off so that at the next meeting, you can shine. Been there done that.

Your boss sees all your hard work, rewards you, sees that your coworker was just trying to stab you in the back, and dishes out the comeuppance your coworker deserves. Been there done that, but not as often as I would like.

The issue is, that I think it's important how and why you do this. Doing that to make yourself better, to repair the damage done, to be a better employee, to show the person who stabbed you in the back that you can't be trifled with; are all great reasons to work you tail off.

But to do it specifically to humiliate your coworker; that seems unhealthy. I realize that the end result is the exact same externally, but internally, I think it makes all the difference in the world.

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Originally Posted by VeeDubb65

But to do it specifically to humiliate your coworker; that seems unhealthy. I realize that the end result is the exact same externally, but internally, I think it makes all the difference in the world.

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agree to disagree. to me, humiliating the coworker is reason enough, and all the other stuff is just a bonus. but i live my life by lex talionis and i understand that not everyone has chosen that path.

i agree with your point that there is some trauma that cannot be dealt with that way. but it seems like 99% of most folks' issues can be dealt with my way. there are definitely exceptions though.

I can respect that, Jockey.

Also, I do agree that 99% falls into the a or b categories.