I posted this in the yahoo group. The response was slim, so I'm trying here:

To make a long story short: I cannot hone, and I have tried many
times, and read and watched many instructionals, and I have never had
a razor sharp enough to shave. I have the requisite gear.

I think that at this point my best bet is to find someone that knows
how to hone and watch him hone and have him watch me try to hone -
there must be something I'm doing wrong, and I am sure it would be
transparent to anyone with experience. So...

I live in Los Angeles presently. Is there anyone in that area who
would be willing to meet with me, or anyone who knows someone I could
go to (maybe some old-fashioned barber somewhere)?