Remember the Sheffields, and keep them holy.
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Remember the Sheffields, and keep them holy.
"Thou shalt send all of your American made straights to Theseus"
Yes, my commandments are really selfish. :)
4. "Thou shalt not strop naked!"I always wondered if I was the only one who Worried about that!!(:-)
- Regardless how many outside the door gather, thou shalt not ever hurry the lather
- When thine arm starts aching, moaning, and groaning, thou shalt take a break from the marathon honing
- SWMBO shall find out, so prepare for the day, when she discovers the history on thy ebay
- RAD, HAD, SAD, and SBAD: they shalt leave a man happy, but his banker quite mad
- No matter how often tempatation may hit, thou shalt not estimate your PHIG hone's true grit
- Thou shalt refer not to chip removal as honing, for Glen will hunt you down to give you a stoning
- Take thou advice from this erstwhile scholar, and never ever mention the bloody Gold Dollar
- Whether honing on coticule, Norton, or Escher, thou shalt not ever use too much pressure
- One day thou shalt laugh and find it quite funny, that thou started wet shaving to save (ha!) some money
- Whether it's dreadnaught or French point, or Irish or Spanish; hollow or wedge that you always find mannish; a giant old chopper or a blade fine as lace, thou shalt find The One that's right for your face
Well spake'd Master gooner.
Mick
Cangooner, you made this old man's day! Thank you, buddy! :bow
well done Cangooner, the beer and music obviously worked.
Cangooner
I realy like #3.
Dave
this is weak, but hey why not enjoy the fun. I made some of my own and borrowed from others
Tablet 1
1- Thou shalt worship no razor other than thy straight razor.
2- Thou shalt not carve’n thy visage with thy blade.
3- Thou shalt not take the Lords name in vain when thy wife or children burst into the bathroom. Thou mayest curseth thy wife, but curseth thy Lord not.
4- Remember thy aftershave, so that thy face doth not get bumpy-eth.
5- Honor thy blade, chipeth it not.
Tablet 2
6- Thou shalt not kill the one who causes you to filet thy face, strike them not. They must sleepeth soon, hold thy revenge until then.
7- Thou shalt not use canned shaving cream. Ever
8- Thou shalt lock the bathroom door, or buy more bandages.
9- Thou shalt honor thy strop and thy brush. Treat them well that they may serve you well.
10- Covet not they neighbors razor. Go and buy-eth your own that you may gloat-eth over others less fortunate than thou.
Tablet 3
11- Stropeth not in thy nakedness less thou grabbeth the wrong leather.
12- Shave not the regions you may regret losing if thou committith error.
13- Clean up thy mess that thy spouse doth not become wroth.
14- Learneth to hone that you may always shave well.
15- Never let thy spouse see thy shave bills.