He who laughs, lasts.
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He who laughs, lasts.
'The farsighted see the terrain features the that cause the nearsighted to stumble. '
TGIF . . . it's been a nibbled to death by ducks week!
Not really a quip. Sent to me by the DJ on Rockabilly Radio:
Picked up a hitch hiker. Seemed like a nice guy.
After a few miles, he asked me if I wasn't afraid that he might be a serial killer?
I told him that the odds of two serial killers being in the same care were extremely unlikely.
In the same vein:
When the statistician was arrested after being discovered with a bomb in his carry on bag, he explained, “I know they chance of there being one bomb on an airplane, but the probability there are two is extremely low. I was just trying to improve my odds of arriving safely.”
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
-- Mike Romanoff
"A friend of mine has a trophy wife, but apparently, it wasn't first place".
Steven Wright
" Doesn't willful stupidity border on insanity? "
LEModesitt ... author
Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.
"If these past few weeks have taught us anything - it's that stupidity travels faster than any virus on the planet"
Anon.
The media is a waste land . . . deceit, lies, thievery, bribery, killings, kidnapping, oathbreaking, rapes, and . . . that's just on the political ads.
Anon
"Pull out your false teeth momma, I wanna suck on your gums"
From lead singer Peter Wolf on J Geils Live Full House Album
“Don’t outsmart your common sense.”
I can’t remember the country singer, but it’s in a song...
This one???Quote:
Originally Posted by FacialDirt
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=trEbO_frSLw
The good shepherds herd and care for the unknowing sheep, to later shear them and are looking forward to a lamb barbecue.
Anon
"He was ignorant of my other faults, else he would not have mentioned these alone.”
~ Epictetus
Nice! Gonna use this one.Quote:
Originally Posted by Library Guy
:tu
Wow, this song sucks, jmho....Quote:
Originally Posted by cudarunner
Question at Amazon about Clubman Pinud:
Is there an unscented version of this product? I love how it works but I operate in the healthcare field where I am not allowed to use fragrance.
Answer:
Yeah there is an unscented version, it's called rubbing alcohol.
I don’t CARE if the package says, “Flushable!” The package is LYING!!
You must work maintenance like I do!!!!!!Quote:
Originally Posted by FacialDirt
Only when completely necessary. While in the bathroom I found myself staring at the wipes and I knew it was going to be the Quip of the Day for me, haha.Quote:
Originally Posted by 32t
'Some windows are always broken when people play ugly Yahoo tricks '
Author unknown
"Behind every great fortune there is a great crime"
Balzac
“Hunny, I’d be careful. That pony had a lot of water.”
-Robin Williams (Mrs. Doubtfire party scene)
A Harley is mans best friend--Tc
Amen!! Although I’m currently, and sadly enough, without a best friend. Lol.Quote:
Originally Posted by cudarunner
" The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read"
. . .Just because I'm a half bubble off, does not mean that the world is level!
Hey guys, we gotta step up our game, these are getting a little weak....JMHO
Perhaps something in this order???Quote:
Originally Posted by Grizzley1
"if you want an adventure, go drinking with a Scotsman cause you can't F**king understand them to start with--
Robin Williams about the game of Golf
:shrug:
I really mean no offense, but meh...Quote:
Originally Posted by cudarunner
Then show us what you would like to see-----Quote:
Originally Posted by Grizzley1
Why is it that all of the instruments seeking intelligent life in the universe are pointed away from Earth?
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.
-- Mark Twain, "The Innocents Abroad"
In Italy, for thirty years under the Borgias, they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michaelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love, they had five hundred years of democracy and peace - and what did they produce? The cuckoo-clock.
-- Orson Welles, "The Third Man"
"There are two types of politicians . . . those who can be bought and those who aren't worth buying "
LEModessit. author
“Don’t put off for tomorrow what you can do today because if you enjoy it today, you can do it again tomorrow.”
– James A. Michener
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
Quote:
Originally Posted by dimab
Quote:
Originally Posted by dimab
See a little poke and they got betterQuote:
Originally Posted by dimab