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CLOSURE: sick of hearing the word because like spooks, h'aints, goblins and ghosts, there is no such thing. Latest - the Boston marathon bomber(s). Nether speedy trial nor fierce punishment of the remaining degenerate will ever create closure for most of the victims or victims families or the poor SOBs who were "unharmed" but proximate to carnage. Been to war? You may go on but you never forget. Closure is some media invention - an illusion.
IMO.
I agree, closure is a B.S. term,,,, & it's usually invoked by someone with no loss in the tragedy.
I guess everyone has a different idea of what exactly closure is. Personally, it means to be able to finally get beyond whatever tragic/traumatic event you were involved in and not let that event overshadow your everyday life. It does not mean you totally forget that event. Some soldiers are able to that and some are not able to. The difference between being able to successfully cope with it or having PTSD. Not everyone has the same coping abilities.
Lets face it, you never get over an event like the death of your parents but at some point you have to function normally in society without that being constantly on your mind. The point at which you can do that is closure.
If you can't find a way to cope you stand a good chance of winding up being one bitter and twisted individual and that is no way to go through life.
That is just imo.
Bob
I had to edit my initial post, left out the word "No" ,,, what a difference one word can make,,,,,
Closure has a few definitions that don't apply to emotional distress. Such as the closure of a factory or business, in that the word indicates the permanent closing of that entity. As far as the emotional meanings of the word, personally I wouldn't discount the validity of the word. I have experienced what I would call closure to a situation. In that it was an emotionally distressing scenario that my thoughts and actions focused on for a period of time, and when I was able to clear my head of what was lingering and close the doors on that chapter of life.
Good thoughts!
The word is in common usage, I was able to use it with my kids for them to understand arraignments for my cremains at the time needed. They got the idea and can make final choices at that time.
~Richard
There are certain things we say that just make us feel good in bad situations or make others feel good. They are more social conventions and mean nothing.
it's like when someone dies say flying an airplane and we say well, he died doing something he likes. Like that makes it OK and we think well they guy probably doesn't regret dying. it makes us feel good but means nothing. Similar is when you meet someone and they say how are you? Do you think they really give a rats behind how you feel. We always say "OK" even though we may not be. The next time some says that to you just say "I'm not doing too well" and see their reaction.
I think it has some validity - there is a famous case over here of a young girl who went missing whilst on holiday with her parents - no body has ever been found but there have been several supposed sightings in various countries. Not only have they had to suffer the loss of their daughter but there is a smear campaign against them on social networks. Whether 'closure' is the right word or not, I'm sure knowing one way or the other would make a difference.
I have always had a difficult time responding to the how are you question. I just cannot do the usual nicety exchange so I usually respond with "hello," which is all that was meant by the question. It's just part of my social maladjustment and I'll probably never find closure over it.Quote:
Originally Posted by thebigspendur
I think there is nothing wrong not liking "how are you". I personally prefer Hi or Hello, most of the time the nicety exchange is pretty hypocritical and is used because it is accepted as a sort of a norm, not that the other party cares how I feel. The "How are you" is more suitable for addressing friends IMO.Quote:
Originally Posted by Utopian