Thread: Roadside Memorials

When did this start?
Recently I have been interested in genealogy. This lead to cemeteries and headstones as I decided to trace one line back to the oldest written record and the same line back to the oldest physical record i.e. a grave marker. Additionally this interest has taken me to 3 local cemeteries and a planned a trip to the Phipps Street Burying Ground in Charlestown, MA to photograph a headstone of the oldest ancestor I could find.
In local cemeteries the two of the many headstones I looked at were 'The Big Train,' Walter Johnson, and F. Scott Fitzgerald. Both of the headstones were strewn with trash which sort of turned a hallowed place into one of those roadside "monuments."
How is a pile of rotting teddy bears and plastic flowers supposed to honor the dead? How about pennies on the headstone? Are they the all American sign of respect (some 47 years ago I saw a exhibit of alligators in San Francisco where the alligators were covered with pennies)?
I guess it is futile to question the manifestation of grief, and probably wrong...but.........damn!

Just a slight thread jack WW243 in reference to coins on a cemetery headstone.


You may have visited a cemetery before and may have seen a headstone with coins on it. Do you know why? This article describes the meaning of placing a coin on the grave marker of a soldier that has made the ultimate sacrifice in the line of duty.

Of course, for some cultures it has different meanings. The ancients would place coins with the deceased with a belief that it would cover the fee to have them cross the river Styx. The tradition of leaving coins with members of the military, especially men or women that may have died in combat, dates back to the Roman Empire.

For the United States, the practice became popular during the Vietnam War. With all of the political turmoil in the 60’s and 70’s surrounding the war, it was a way for friends and comrades to visit a fallen friend and leave a coin as a marker to the family that they had been there to pay respect, without having to contact the family directly, and possibly make a bad situation worse.

As for meanings of different denominations of coins, a friend, or an acquaintance that visits may only leave a penny. A nickel would be left by someone that may have been through boot camp or trained with them, while someone that served in another platoon in the same company may leave a dime. A quarter would be left by someone that served in the same outfit or was with the soldier when they died.

Some Vietnam veterans would simply leave coins as a “down payment” to buy their fallen comrades a beer or to play a hand of cards when they would finally be reunited.

Pennies are left on graves, most of all, in remembrance of the deceased. Leaving a coin from your pocket is a way to leave a part of yourself at the burial site. The coin is a visual reminder that, even in death, the memory of the deceased lives on. It is also a sign of respect to the dead, as it shows that their memory has value to you and is something you want to commemorate.

This is a tradition that has been held onto by members of the United States Military. The money left at graves in national cemeteries and state veterans cemeteries is left in place for a time, but is eventually collected, and the funds are put toward maintaining the cemetery or paying burial costs for indigent veterans.

The Air Force fighter pilots throw nickels into the grass at grave sites. This tradition began in the early 50’s when phone calls on public phones were only a nickel. Prior to leaving on a dangerous mission, pilots would toss a nickel into the grass so his team mates could notify the next of kin if he didn’t make it back.

Jewish people leave stones on headstones – there are many variations to this practice, but most popular is that cemetery visitors leave a pebble or stone as a token to commemorate their visit. The amount of pebbles gathered over time, unofficially, represent the level of mourners who had visited the grave site.

No matter what the original intention of the coin or pebble may be, it seems clear that when left on a headstone it’s a symbol of remembrance and respect. A way of telling all who pass by that the person buried there was loved and visited often.

Ok, schooled on the coins. How about baseballs, plastic flowers, glasses, ballpoint pen, and all manner of stuff that will deteriorate, mold etc?

Sunday I was pondering the same question

The Credit Union the wife works for has a 2 mile stretch of Highway that they "Sponsor" so I go with her and help clean a bit but mostly drive the Ranger back and forth ferrying people water and trash bags

Anyway as I was actually cleaning part of my stretch included a small roadside marker, I cleaned up around it and untangled the wind spinners to get them going again.. I was thinking the same thing we see quite a few of these now but I sure don't remember them growing up..

It takes time & effort to maintain a grave/memorial,,, often the tribute is started by a love one, who throughout the following years becomes unable to care for the grave. If it were not for the funds set aside by states & federal authorities, I would hate to think what our most cherished memorials would look like.
The dead are most often,,, forgotten.

My wife does genealogy and maintains her family website with the same. A good website to find grave markers is findagrave.com where you may find information and many times a picture of it also. This may save you some time.


Mike

This thread made me think of the last scene from "Schindler's List" where the people
he saved and their descendants are putting pebbles on Oskar Schindler's grave....


In my neighbourhood, the grave of Bon Scott, the founder and original singer of AC/DC.
People pay tribute in different ways I guess....

Originally Posted by lz6

Just a slight thread jack WW243 in reference to coins on a cemetery headstone.


You may have visited a cemetery before and may have seen a headstone with coins on it. Do you know why? This article describes the meaning of placing a coin on the grave marker of a soldier that has made the ultimate sacrifice in the line of duty. ...
No matter what the original intention of the coin or pebble may be, it seems clear that when left on a headstone it’s a symbol of remembrance and respect. A way of telling all who pass by that the person buried there was loved and visited often.

That story is true and you see that practice often in Arlington National Cemetery, where it is especially touching. Of course there, and in the other National Cemeteries, things are "swept up" regularly, but it can still be a very evocative reminder that those rows of stones are people's loved ones who served the country, not just "graves". I have a lot of friends in Arlington, and when I visit, even after all these years, I am still touched by the scene there.

In the case of famous people like the OP cited, I think it's less appropriate to leave "junk" around, unless you are a family member and it is meaningful to you. Even then, most things will be removed regularly in a well maintained cemetery.

Originally Posted by mglindo

My wife does genealogy and maintains her family website with the same. A good website to find grave markers is findagrave.com where you may find information and many times a picture of it also. This may save you some time.


Mike

Absolutely, findagrave is pretty amazing...you can request a volunteer to photograph a headstone for you. I assume they live near the cemetery. I did that but the volunteer photographed the stone backlit so it is difficult to read the inscription. I thanked him on the site. I really like the colonial headstones with the Death's heads, Latin...fascinating stuff.

I've been a member of Find A Grave for a few years. It's a good place to track genealogy & keep a permanent record of your own family.