Thread: Are You Happy?

My wife of 41 years and I agree that we are so busy counting our blessings that we just don't have time to see a down side. We have been blessed with a great son, a fantastic grand daughter (truly a rose with no thorns) and a long life in the incredible United States of America. I had the opportunity to serve my country as a member of the US Navy and I am extremly proud of that. We realize that not all have been so fortunate and do what we can through volunteering for community services and contributing all we can to United Way and my wifes church.
I nominate Tony Miller as our spirtual leader.
God bless you all and God bless the United States of America

I wake up every morning and I pick my attitude for the day, the entire day... and that attitude is one of love for your fellow man, appreciation for even the smallest things, and gratefulness for everything and everyone in my life. When you pick this attitude for each and every day, every day will be great by definition. Some may say that this is very Polyanna like but I challenge you to do it for seven full days and see if it doesn't change your day and your life.
I'm 56 years old, married to my lovely wife for 30 years, and have three wonderful boys and two grandchildren.

All in all I'm pretty much happy. I've found hobbies that satisfy me, and have a wife that I love to be with, and I live on a beautiful piece of property.

The only thing I'm missing is enough spare money to do nothing but enjoy it. Thats why I'm only happy not thrilled at this point in my life.

Thanks for starting this thread, Tony. It's good to stop sometimes and reflect a bit; something I know I don't do enough (and I even go on at least one 4 day silent Christian men's retreat each year).

Short answer: Happiness is not an ideal that I continually try to jump up and grasp. I'm thankful for it when it's there and try to enjoy it in the moment. Happiness is fleeting (would anyone really want to be in a state of happiness continually?). Contentedness can last longer.

I'm 38 now. While the household I grew up in was not outwardly chaotic, I'm the son of a man who served in Vietnam, has two separate Purple Hearts and lifelong PTSD to show for it. PTSD affects more than the one person, it affects those close to that person. As a teenager and into my late twenties, let's just say I self medicated in many different ways and lived a destructive lifestyle. I craved chaos and invented it when it wasn't there. My dad's a salesman and formed his own company. When I was a kid, I'd lay awake at night hearing him worry out loud, being paid on commission only that we'd all be broke and have to sell the house. I'd spend many hours, not even really scared about it, but literally planning on how I was going to live out of a cardboard box as an eight year old. As a freshman in college I would flippantly remark that I thought I'd be dead by 24 and was fine with that notion at the time. Well, the good Lord had a better plan for me. I finally had enough of the empty promises of the me me me message so prevalently touted as the answer to true happiness and pulled myself up by the grace of God. I have a loving wife and two boys; a solid family. I'm not owed or entitled to those boys or my wife. Each and every day with them is it's own priceless gift/blessing.

So.......am I happy? Considering that as a child I was convinced I was going to be homeless and as a teen that I would be dead by 24, you bet I'm happy! I can also say the storm that was raging inside me until my late twenties has since calmed sans Rx which I am ever so thankful for. I couldn't be happier about that.

Thanks again, Tony!

Chris L

I was going to be a wise guy and say that i would be happy if I had a four sided paddle strop but I won't go there. I'm reminded that Abraham Lincoln, who was plagued by depression, was reputed to have said,"You can be as happy as you make up your mind to be". That has kind of stuck with me. I also picked up along the way the premise that happiness is a byproduct of doing the right thing. So I am reasonably happy. As long as I can stay healthy and be self sufficient I will remain reasonably happy ........ even if I don't have a four sided paddle strop.

All things considered, I am content / happy with my life.

I have a loving wife and 2 lovely daughters. Both me and my wife have good jobs, meaning that - while not being rich- we don't have money issues.
We both love our jobs, and have a nice house to live in.
None of us have serious health issues, which is another blessing.

I do have a number of allergies that limit me somewhat in what I can do / eat, but my brother has a number of chronic illnesses that are far worse, so I can place my 'inconveniences' in perspective.

There are some things I would like to spend more time on, but with the 2 young kids (3 years / 10 months) most of my free time goes to the household.
I try not to let it bother me, because that is the consequence of having kids. It'll get better in a couple of years.

I choose to be happy regardless of what's going on around me - just won't stay angry or upset for long periods of time. It helps to be loved by the woman I love and to know God well enough to understand He loves me too. During the most trying times of my life I found out that my perspective was more important for my own well-being than the circumstances around me. I think that's a simple principle, and what's wrong with simple principles?

Very interesting thread here, I enjoy reading what everyone has to say.

Overall yes, over the last two months... not so much.

But I'm still optomistic I know that happiness is right around the corner.

I'm 34 and actually writing my PhD in Mediaeval Philosophy (no no, it's not a joke...) I've worked to pay my studies (with also the generous help from my parents and a loan) since I was 14 and now, for the first time ever, one year before finishing, I am jobless, but with enough work to do that I could drown under it (that's the problem when you're writing a thesis: you will always have enough work to do, but not that many people interested to pay you for doing it). I have already published an article and a few book reviews, but it doesn't seem to be enough... the big problem is: I need to work to finish my PhD but nobody wants to hire me if I don't have it (and those who could - to teach in college for example - don't want to hire a man who will go away after one or two years; and doing something completely different will only delay me from obtaining the desired diploma).

I'm living with my wife in a ridiculously small rented apartment (a little less than 35 square meters), filled with books (she is also studying at the university but managed to get a 60% job for two years), cheap or second hand furnitures, no car...

Our heads are full with hopes and projects, having children, decent jobs, a little house we can own, a garden... and we are really busy trying to achieve them.

So am I happy ? I mean, I have a wonderful wife I love, I have an interesting work I like, I have a roof on my head, I have friends and hobbies (all this wet shaving stuff arrived just in time to change my routine, make me happy in the morning and help me take the day with the right foot). So, even in this valley of tears, I can say I am happy, struggling through this world to find my place in the society (I've already found where I belong). I am confident I will find it. I just hope the struggle will not last too long...

And, oh yes, last but not least, faith helps; without it I will only be like an empty basket on a river; thank God, He gives us hope and strength. I think that life is more a way to holiness than to happiness... Happiness is something more like a state of mind we can achieve than something we will receive, like a reward.

I suppose the fact that we are all here doing this means a certain level of happiness - contentment is great gain! Couldn't resist sticking in a bit of Burns below - a phrase I find myself saying a lot since I lost my mum and dad in the last few years is "catch the moments as they fly". I am just about to finish my last assignment before dissertation and then I am off up the hills for a few days with some mates. Great wife, daughter, all healthy and enough 'credits' to see us alright. It hasn't always been like that nor will it in the future, I am sure, so catch the moments as they fly man!


Here's A Bottle
by Robert Burns

There's nane that's blest of human kind
But the cheerful and the gay, man.
Here's a bottle and an honest friend!
What wad ye wish for mair, man?
Wha kens, before his life may end,
What his share may be o' care, man? Then catch the moments as they fly,
And use them as ye ought, man!
Believe me, Happiness is shy,
And comes not ay when sought, man!