Thread: Ever heard of the mall ninja?

This is some fun reading if you have the time:
http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/

Man, that is priceless stuff.

But then again I think of the mayors nephew, his face distored with tears and terror, the GAP employees who asked for my autograph, and had to settle for a cover identity’s signature, the flashbangs, and their acrid scent, the small of napalm in the evening breeze, as I crouch behind a shopping cart in the parking lot...

HNSB... I love you...

Thank you for that.

"If Plan A is to take multiple .338 shots to the back, you really need to come up with a Plan B.”

Pretty much sums it up IMO...

That's just great stuff.

This also made it to martialtalk.com some time go, and before that it came from some gun forum where Gecko45 made / makes an occasional appearance. I think one of the gun forum guys said it was some sort of hoax.
The other guy who was egging him on was definitely a dummy account of a real member, making the story wilder and wilder as it went along.

I don't doubt at all that it was a hoax... Probably one of their regular members with an alter-ego just having a good time.

It's still pretty darn funny though.

Guys like these often show up on Bladeforums and knifeforums. They think that with a knife in their hand, they become superman. The last one I remember was a guy looking for a knife to hunt bears. Not to dress the bear once he shot it, he wanted to stab a bear to death.

Probably the same on gun forums, but I'm not a member of any of them so I can't tell for sure.

Some one takes their job way too seriously.

I know what you mean. The Neo’s are getting fierce around here, the NeoNazis, they have just recently discovered the Grizzly Big Boar .50BMG rifle, and since they must be getting funding from someone, perhaps that well known surviving faction in E. Geermany, I can’t confiscate their cut down versions before they’re right back with another one but fortunately, since their MO is surpise and concealment, the fools don’t bother to put even a cheap Leapers scope on them, and that gives me that tacticla advantage, and thgus far they have missed both time they shot the decoy before confiscation could be initiated.

I have never had to deal with bolt action sniper rifles, these punk’s tastes run to Ack-Ack guns, and I have taken away 4 stens that they probably stole from Grandaddy’s closet, a Thompson hacked short on both ends,a and more pistol-gripped AK clones than i care to count. These kids want blood, and since they will have to go through me to shed any in my mall, I am constantly doging near misses and ricochets, I have taken to doubling up on my regular regimen on Body armor, as you probaly knwo.

Wow, just wow. Methinks someone may be off his meds again...
An absolutely hilarious read HNSB, thanks a lot!