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Thread: Management

  1. #1
    Senior Member welshwizard's Avatar
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    Default Management

    A Japanese company and an American company decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River.
    Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

    On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.

    The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat.
    A management team made up of senior management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action.
    Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the American team had 8 people steering and 1 person rowing.
    So, American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion.
    They advised that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing.

    To prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 3 area steering superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager. They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 1 person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder.

    It was called the "Rowing Team Quality First Program," with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rower. There was discussion about getting new paddles, canoes, and other equipment, plus extra vacation days for practices, and also bonuses.

    The next year the Japanese won by two miles.

    Humiliated, the American management laid off the rower for poor performance, halted development of a new canoe, sold the paddles, and cancelled all capital investments for new equipment.

    The money saved was distributed to the Senior Executives as bonuses and the next year's racing team was outsourced to India.


    'Living the dream, one nightmare at a time'

  2. #2
    Newbie Desdinova's Avatar
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    I always love this one.

    And my response is always this:



    The Japanese canoe had a 9.9hp motor on the back (courtesy of the Japanese government manipulating the Yen) plus a few extra rowers in the back (the Southern states governors that gave excessive tax breaks for new plants in America)


    While at the same time the American canoe still had 2 anchors set out. One called the union and the other called domestic red tape and governmental interference.

  3. #3
    They call me Mr Bear. Stubear's Avatar
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    Yep, that sounds about right...


  4. #4
    Heat it and beat it Bruno's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Desdinova View Post
    While at the same time the American canoe still had 2 anchors set out. One called the union and the other called domestic red tape and governmental interference.
    The union remark is a fair point, but when it comes to bureaucracy and red tape, the US really can't hold a candle to Japan.
    Til shade is gone, til water is gone, Into the shadow with teeth bared, screaming defiance with the last breath.
    To spit in Sightblinder’s eye on the Last Day

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    Senior Member blabbermouth JimR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bruno View Post
    The union remark is a fair point, but when it comes to bureaucracy and red tape, the US really can't hold a candle to Japan.

    Sweet Jesus yes...

    People always talk about Japanese efficiency. EFFICIENCY?

    How is one man doing the work of three and working himself into an early grave EFFICIENCY?

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    what Dad calls me nun2sharp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JimR View Post
    Sweet Jesus yes...

    People always talk about Japanese efficiency. EFFICIENCY?

    How is one man doing the work of three and working himself into an early grave EFFICIENCY?

    It's not efficient, it's CHEAP!
    It is easier to fool people than to convince them they have been fooled. Twain

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