Thread: My Son

Originally Posted by jnich67

Rich, I'm wishing your son a speedy recovery. I used to have gastro issues as a kid. A lot of it had to do with stress. Don't forget to consider stress if the docs can't come up with anything more concrete.

Jordan

Jordan,

I was beginning to think it might be along those lines.. He started with a new school this year and high school is coming up hummmm.. Thanks for the thought.

Rich,

My sympathies... illness is never easy and when it's your child its devastating. Best wishes for a speedy recovery.

And I also send you wishes for a great holiday. Make the best of it and celebrate like always. Worrying won't help. Do fun things with your son... if he thinks that you're not too worried, he won't be worried either... and that's the best thing for him short of a cure.

Meanwhile, hopefully you have found some doctors you trust and they are committed to finding the problem... after all, that's what doctors should do, isn't it. I know that's increasingly not the case... but don't let them do that to you... let them know that you're expecting them to be responsible for a solution!

I know medicine is partly science and partly art. But these days, when diagnosis isn't easy (which appears to be your son's case), too often PCPs just keep sending us to specialists who run a few tests and say they don't know what the problem is and send us back to our PCP to recommend another specialist. No one seems willing to take on the responsibility of solving the problem... everyone wants to delegate it to someone else. Effectively we're abandoned if the diagnosis & treatment isn't obvious. Meanwhile, we keep paying the copays and taking the tests... and the only obvious things happening is the healthcare industry is flourishing.... and the patient is still sick.

IMHO, our society has fallen victim to our insurance system... they're making money by not allowing us to seek the diagnostics and treatments we need. Today, who the hell can afford to pay for healthcare out of pocket? Not many! Think about it... what if every doctor could shed the 4-6 people they employ to process the paperwork and actions required by the insurance industry... how much could be saved. What if the doctor could spend the time they have to spend dealing with insurance issues treating patients and keeping up with new treatments and diagnostic procedures? Ooooh... don't get me started.... back to the reality of the day...

So do that internet research. Ask your doctors the tough questions. Fight back against your insurance company and PCP if they start denying approvals for specialists, diagnostics, and treatments you think are needed. If push comes to shove go out of network and see the doctors you need to anyway... go to Mayo or wherever if that's what you think you need to do... your son is to valuable to NOT do it! (Besides, almost all doctors and hospitals will write off part of the bill and take easy payments.)

Originally Posted by azjoe

Rich,

IMHO, our society has fallen victim to our insurance system... they're making money by not allowing us to seek the diagnostics and treatments we need. Today, who the hell can afford to pay for healthcare out of pocket? Not many! Think about it... what if every doctor could shed the 4-6 people they employ to process the paperwork and actions required by the insurance industry... how much could be saved. What if the doctor could spend the time they have to spend dealing with insurance issues treating patients and keeping up with new treatments and diagnostic procedures? Ooooh... don't get me started.... back to the reality of the day...

So do that internet research. Ask your doctors the tough questions. Fight back against your insurance company and PCP if they start denying approvals for specialists, diagnostics, and treatments you think are needed. If push comes to shove go out of network and see the doctors you need to anyway... go to Mayo or wherever if that's what you think you need to do... your son is to valuable to NOT do it! (Besides, almost all doctors and hospitals will write off part of the bill and take easy payments.)

Having worked in the health ins. business (yes, for HMOs - hey! stop throwing rocks!) for some years, I understand your frustration. But there is plenty of blame to go around among the insurers, doctors, hospitals, drug manufacturers, politicians, and yes - patients for the inefficiencies that plague the system. I'd be happy to discuss this further in another thread.

Rich, if you hit any snags with your health plan I may be able to help translate or at least get you pointed in the right direction. Let me know.

Jordan

Originally Posted by jnich67

hey! stop throwing rocks!)

Sorry I singled out the Insurance Industry... I know it's much larger than that... I really meant the whole health care industry. And of course patients have gotten outta control, too.

Sometimes rocks need to be thrown to wake people up... me included, lol.

I'm old enough to have lived before insurance covered routine stuff like it does today. Back then no one went to the doctor for things that could be treated at home or would heal with time. I'm not sure that was always wise, but that's the way it was. Today I've seen women take the same kid to the same doctor for the same cold every day for a week. WTF!

• Fact... when I was a kid the total cost of a visit to the Doctor was usually between $5-8, and that included any shots he gave in the office and usually any pills needed. No insurance was involved (or even available, AFAIK).
• Fact... when he came to the house it was more, but I don't know what.
• Fact... he had no staff... none was needed.
• Fact... based on CPI that $5 is worth something like $38 today.
• Fact... the total cost of a typical doctor visit for my wife today is somewhere in the $165 range plus the cost of the medicine! (if she had no insurance). I mean for something simple... like a sinus infection or a cold. If he gives her a shot or does a simple procedure it rapidly approaches $400-500... or more.

I haven't (thankfully) needed to go to a doctor for over 10 years. Rich, sorry for the hijaack. I'll stop, I promise.

well, I really dislike seeing anyone in distress especially children, and you and Family will also be in my prayers, but i do like one of the comments made above, about you need to show your son that you are not that upset/concerned about what is happening by that i do not mean stop giving him hugs and stuff but any of the concerns you have, mask untill he is in bed or out, that way he shall be contfident that there is nothing really wrong with what is happening to him. Feel free to Rant as much as you like on here use it like a Electronic punch bag.

Originally Posted by Yourmum90

well, I really dislike seeing anyone in distress especially children, and you and Family will also be in my prayers, but i do like one of the comments made above, about you need to show your son that you are not that upset/concerned about what is happening by that i do not mean stop giving him hugs and stuff but any of the concerns you have, mask untill he is in bed or out, that way he shall be contfident that there is nothing really wrong with what is happening to him. Feel free to Rant as much as you like on here use it like a Electronic punch bag.

Thanks good advice

Just want to update you. My wife took Richie to a new MD yesterday, urologist saw the catscan of his kidneys and said wow thats wild. But at least he listened to my wife and didn't talk down to her - good first step.

that is the hardest step you have to take with the medical profession, you feel like the outsider when they talk to you as if your 5 years old. by the way i use a search engine at work called Medline and it has hundreds of documents on it about 100's of problems/medication if you want me to search for anything then PM me or leave a post in here to that effect. Rich