Thread: Chivalry Is Not Dead!

First of all, I hope it's okay that I posted this one here. I realize this is geared more towards actual things, but I do consider this one of the intangible finer things in life.
One of the greatest joys I experience on a daily basis is taking small opportunities to be chivalrous to ladies everywhere, whether that be holding the door for my wife or a complete stranger.
So, that being said, what do you do to keep the art of being a true, chivalrous gentleman alive and well on a daily basis?

I also agree with you. I am a 57 yoa gentleman and was raised to respect the ladies. When I park my car for work I ride a shuttle bus and alway let the ladies get on the bus first. I also complement the ladies on how they look and they love it. I know this is not correct to do at work anymore, but so be it. Its good to see someone else thinks the same way--Dennis

I was raised by my grandparents, so I was weaned on circa 1940s values. (They were both born in the late teens.) My grandfather was a USAF officer and instilled in me the idea of 'chivalrous virtue'. I always hold the door. (Even when very independent minded ladies decide to hit me with their handbag- Only happened once in MD - and I STILL don't understand it.) I always stand till all the ladies have been seated. I endeavor to be as steadfastly loyal as possible, even to a fault. I do not lie, however I will be tactful when necessary. When I am served before others in a restaurant, I wait for everyone to be served before eating, even if others have already started.
Basically I see it coming down to an extension of the 'golden rule' and general etiquette (and no, not the one where 'he who has the gold, makes the rules').
I demand a lot from other people, because I demand much of myself. If you feel like something is not right, there is probably a reason for it. Of course this type of idealism seems to be getting more and more scarce with larger and larger populations. Maybe the scope of my view is too small and chivalry lives loud and proud just over the next hill, however I doubt it...
And I'll admit that it is rather odd that I feel so adamantly about this, yet fail to believe in any type of moral objectivity. Oh well, contradiction and paradox just make things fun, right?

I can't believe that you were hit for holding the door for someone!
All of the things that you mentioned such as waiting for all ladies to find a seat and waiting until everyone has their food are little things, but can make a big difference to people. Some people may find it pretentious, but for the vast majority of people I have met, it is refreshing to be reminded that the underlying value behind chivalry is still alive and well. That value is a simple and powerful one: respect.
What do you mean by failing to believe in moral objectivity? I don't mean that in a condescending tone at all, I'm simply curious

I demand alot from myself but, I dont necessarily expect everyone else to have the same etiquette. If I did that everytime someone failed to meet my expectations I would have a very short temper and heart problems. But I do wish that people would just be a bit nicer, I blame it on those damn hip hoppers...

but I live in Glasgow and a friend of a friend was on a bus and a NED (Non Educated Dilinquint) had just told an old lady to **** off after asking for seat where the friend of a friend promptly walked over, picked him up, took him off the bus and gave him a good hiding.

Very extreme, but I laughed my nipples off when I heard it. If you live in Glasgow you'll know what I'm talking about

One of the greatest joys I experience on a daily basis is taking small opportunities to be chivalrous to ladies everywhere, whether that be holding the door for my wife or a complete stranger.
So, that being said, what do you do to keep the art of being a true, chivalrous gentleman alive and well on a daily basis?

I don't know if that works these days, but I'll give it a go who knows might get lucky

I'll carry prams up stairs or off trains - male or female - as I just see it as being helpful. I dont know if its being chivalrous, but if someone asks you a question, like whens the next train? or something like that I try to start up a conversation - more out of boredom really - but I just see it as polite as otherwise I feel you would come off as not wanting to know these people.

The last guy I talked to had just been to a masseur for his birthday, that his wife got him and he couldn't be bothered doing anything for the rest of the day, it was that good. I think its polite to talk to strangers, especially with the closed mindset that kids have these days.

Otherwise your just a zombie that can choose his meals from a menu.

I escorted an elderly lady I didn't know to the woman's room in Manhattan last week. I found her wandering the back hallways of a restaurant while I was looking for the men's room. I waited for her and brought her back to her table. I don't think that's chivalry though. I think that's just human decency.

Originally Posted by AlexRankin

I escorted an elderly lady I didn't know to the woman's room in Manhattan last week. I found her wandering the back hallways of a restaurant while I was looking for the men's room. I waited for her and brought her back to her table. I don't think that's chivalry though. I think that's just human decency.

potato potato, tomato tomato

Wanna win big points with your wife, mom, sister, grandma, aunt, bosses' wife, etc...add to the list of courtesies: Stand when I woman enters the room/leaves the room, comes to the table, leaves the table.

My 2 cents.

Ok,

Here is my contribution towards this post and what I do on a daily basis.

Yes Ma'am and No Sirs regardless of age. Sadly, I have turned the corner where people start telling me the same thing

Pulling chairs out for ladies when eating.

When walking with a female, walk towards the street side.

Pull the door open for people entering or exiting a building.

Open the door for a woman on your car. BONUS: if the woman reaches over or unlocks the car for you when your walking around to your side.

Im sure I have some others, but they escape my mind at the moment.



Now I have always wanted to get into the habit of standing when a woman enters the room. I have tried, but just cant seem to get into a serious routine about it. I do need to practice with this a bit more.

If some young wippersnapper says sir to me I'm gonna punch him in the nose.

I LOL'd at the sir comment! All of these are great suggestions! And I agree completely that most of it is simple human decency, but I think it means a lot to go out of our way with the ladies in the world since they are devalued everywhere in our society, whether that be advertising or movies or whatever. Making people feel like they are valued is one of the greatest gifts you can give someone.

I would like to get in the habit of standing when a lady enters the room, that's a great suggestion!