Thread: TOO MUCH COFFEE!!!

Sometimes the best laughter is when you can laugh at yourself. I got such a laugh this morning.

I'm a coffee drinker. I usually drink it the entire time that I'm at the office and I usually put in a lot of hours during the week. But once in a while a Saturday rolls around when I don't have to go to the office or anywhere else. The family and I will sleep in and kind of ease into the day. Today was such a day. I enjoyed being kind of lazy this morning all the while nursing a cup of hot coffee, keeping with my habits, and looking forward to taking a little extra time to shave, three passes instead of the usual two, and going for BBS.

By early afternoon, I had finished the entire pot of coffee (a big pot) right before stropping today's razor and taking a shower. After the shower, I went thru the usual pre-shave routine and began my shave. One pass, two passes, almost thru with the third pass. No problems. By this time, I'm feeling kind of smug because I can tell I'm getting a great shave. All I had left was to finish the ATG pass on my chin (the moustache eliminates the problem shaving the upper lip).

As I began the "up strokes" on the chin and lower lip, I couldn't keep my hand steady. I had what the golfers of the forum may know as the "yips" that are sometimes experienced on the putting green. It was a miracle that I didn't cut myself as the edge bounced across my chin on my first two attempts. I wondered what was going on when it hit me, "You . You're about to cut yourself shaving and caffeine is going to pour out all over the bathroom." Nevertheless, I was determined to finish what promised to be a great shave so I choked up on the razor as much as possible and very slowly and methodically finished my chin using the heel of the edge. Somehow, I did it without bleeding and finishing BBS.

If there is a moral to this story, it is that straight shaving is like riding a motorcycle. It should not be attempted while mentally distracted or physically impaired and I had forgotten how the fine motor skills of even an experienced coffee hound such as myself could be effected by an OD on caffeine.

I laughingly told SWMBO about my experience to which she responded with her usual remarks about having to have me stitched up one day as a result of my shaving.She immediately thereafter proceeded to lacerate the full length of her thigh with one of those cheap plastic things some people call razors while shaving her legs. I know, I should have left things alone at that point but I couldn't help but say something. That's another story!

Have a great day and go light on the beverages before shaving.

I was laughing so hard reading your post.
The other day I had to stop stropping & put my razor down for later because I had drank so much coffee that morning I couldn't keep the razor flat on the strop from a shaky hand LOL. I couldn't stop laughing at my self.

Originally Posted by lawman2

I couldn't help but say something. That's another story!

But thats the one I wanted to hear!

I've said coffee is as much a drug as anything else. I know people completely addicted to it. my mom for one. personally I've never enjoyed it and caffeine doesn't do anything for me. I once drank a whole pot trying to stay awake, fell right to sleep.

Red

I have the shakes without coffee, so when I drink about 5-6 cups on an empty stomach after havin' a few too many drinks the night before it's like trying to shave while standing on a vibratory finisher.

When I have a morning like that? WTG only!

Same thing happened to me. I drink about 3 cups in the morn and I am fine for the day. One day I drank my 3 cups on a weekend and I showered and went through the shave routine. Well when I put blade to skin I knew I made a mistake. I finished, but looked like I got into a fight with a feral cat.

Does this remind you of anyone?

This comes to mind after reading that:

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I had the same experience today, normally I'm a 2 pint coffee per day man with some espresso thrown in here and there, so caffeine doesn't affect me very much, but now after being sick over the holidays I haven't touched coffee in over a month, so when I started at my new work today I wanted to be alert and sharp after only 6 hours of sleep (try going from getting up 12:30 pm one day to 6:30 am the next and you'll know what I mean), so I brewed one liter of strong black coffee and downed it while shaving, eating breakfast and the last half liter while driving to work. Man I was shaky when I got there, had me drinking water on the coffee-breaks for the rest of the day.