Thread: Rapid Shave

OK, I probably shouldn't admit to the following, but here it goes:

We had a big party at the house Saturday evening - expecting close to 50 guests. We had a very busy day leading up to the party & I showered late. I got out of the shower and was stropping my razor when I noticed it was 15 minutes before guests were to arrive. I realized it would not be my normal long and relaxing shave. Since I decided to cut the goatee off a month or so ago and now have to tackle my chin, my shaves normally take me 25-30 min minimum. I was sporting 2 days' growth and definitely looked scruffy. I was tempted (gasp!) to pull out the G*****e F****n, but decided not to slide down that slippery slope. Yes, I would carefully attempt my fastest straight razor shave ever.

I had lather on my face and my razor approaching skin when SWMBO walked in and in a tone of disapproving disbelief said “You’re going to shave!? I've been so busy I haven't been able to change my clothes yet! Who's going to answer the door?" Whew! Pressure's rising - must not let the stress cause me to tighten my grip on the razor. Deep breaths, light touch, poetry in motion... must not let obsessive nature take over - concentrate on beard reduction, not BBS!

Gentlemen, three light passes in about 7-10 minutes. Much to my shock, it was a respectable shave. Portions, but not the entire face were BBS. However there were no blatantly missed whiskers, only one tiny nick, and a close visual inspection in the mirror revealed a respectable shave.

Special thanks to LinacMan Junior for being my personal valet. He laid my clothes out for me, washed out my brush and scuttle and straightened out the shave den while I dressed.

I don't plan to let this be the norm, but I learned that I don't have to be obsessive about some areas of my face to get a good shave.

Testosterone makes you attempt dangerous feats. It makes you live for the adrenaline rush. Sometimes you have to live on the edge and take crazy risks like this. The risk taken? I'm not talking about shaving fast with a wicked sharp straight razor, I'm talking about risking SWMBO's ire.

Legal disclamer: Do NOT attempt this yourself. The OP is not a trained professional, just a stupid guy doing stupid things.

Great post, hope the party went as successfully as the shave.

Hello, LinacMan:

Thank you for that informative and useful post. Well done, sir.

Regards,
Obie

It typically takes me only 15 minutes to shave in the morning (this is after a shower). Of course I only do the one natural pass (all you really need). Abscent the shower, I would have to add another 5 minutes for prep (hot towels).

Sometimes shaving's just shaving, even with us. It's nice to have the skills to be able to rattle out a shave, but still use the right tool.
It's also nice to be able to take your time & really enjoy it, but when needs must, you've proved what you've learned over the past months.

Originally Posted by LinacMan

I had lather on my face and my razor approaching skin when SWMBO walked in and in a tone of disapproving disbelief said “You’re going to shave!? I've been so busy I haven't been able to change my clothes yet!

LinacMan,

You just won the prize for most spine-tingling post of the year. Sounds eerily familiar to me. Are you sure our wives aren't related?

I'm still laughing (because I can relate). I'm proud that you are doing so well after such a short time. The wife may yet gift you with a new fine razor after such a performance. I hope the party was a success. Thanks for an entertaining tale!

LOL - I think everyone needs to develop several versions of shave and know when to use which. I have my minimalist 1 pass shave all the way up to my luxury shave of 4 passes and several in between.

I use what I need for the occasion and the time I have.

That's great that your son was your valet. Every gentleman needs one!

i started laughing like crazy when you recruited junior as a valet.. he washed your brush? that's awesome..

I have one razor that I shave with regularly unless I am shave testing honed razors. With that razor, I literally can do a full shave with my eyes closed. Yup, tried that out a few times just to see what it was like. My regular morning shave, including lathering and stropping, takes 7 minutes. It's not Shave Of The Day material, but it gets the job done.