Thread: The Trouble With Wives...

About a month ago, the downstairs toilet started to run. If you jiggled the handle for a bit, it'd stop. Well, I know how to fix it. It wasn't an emergency so it was pretty low on my list of priorities, but it was annoying the wife, who couldn't walk by the bathroom without reminding me that it needed to be fixed. Of course, she always reminded me when I was in the middle of some other work, or when I had just sat down for a beer in the late afternoon.

As days turned into weeks, the reminding turned into nagging. Now, don't get me wrong, I knew the toilet needed fixing,. Hell, I wanted to fix it. It's just that, after a few weeks of needling by the Mrs, I started to dread the lecture that you always get after the job is done. You know the one;"Look, that took you 10 minutes, and how long have I been forced to nag you about that!?". Something about that little barb just gets under my skin so much that I find that I will actually avoid taking care of the things that she "reminds" me to do.

Well, I fixed the toilet this AM. I almost didn't tell her, but instead, as I walked past her in the kitchen to get another cup of coffee, I said "I fixed the toilet, hon". That didn't make it under the radar though, and the mini-lecture started.

Now, I don't know how to stop a wife from lecturing, but I this morning, I learned a way (or, I should say, 'I learned yet another way ) to make it turn into a long argument that turns into the silent wife treatment. All you have to do is hold up your finger and say "Sush, woman. A simple 'thank you' will do"

Does anyone else ever have the same dread of fixing something that the wife's been nagging about? Is it just me? Maybe on some subconscious level, I don't like women telling me what to do. Maybe I can't organize my time well enough to take care of all the things I need to do each day, and when I'm reminded of that I take it hard. Either way, it sure seems to get under the old lady's skin. And one thing I've learned about women in general is that they rarely let something bother them for very long without letting you know.

Feel my pain, brothers.

Your a braver man than I

You have to learn the trick of closing the door behind you and making little clatters and bangs for half an hour, punctuated by short journeys to the shed to find some more tools. Don't forget to dirty your hands, perhaps your face as well and splash yourself liberally with water (from the sink and not the toilet of course).

Then you can't get the "that only took you 5 minutes" lecture.

better yet pull the bathroom asunder and leave it like that for a couple of weeks.
then she will never ask you fix anything again

Once I made my wife come and watch me fix the car because she wouldn't quit bitching that it took so long every time I fix something " and it always costs more than you said"

I think I was replacing the bearing in the AC clutch.

Just so you know, = F**K or F*****G

for you reading pleasure

jack the car up, take the wheel off,
take the fender skirt off,
put a jack under the motor,
remove the bolt in the motor mount,
lower the motor,
take both belts off
remove the frozen bolt from the center of cluth,
try to hold the pulley with a strap wrench trying to screw in the puller bolt into the clutch,
tear the first thread off ,
get the proper tap and chase the threads,
find out puller bolt is wrong thread even though this IS the right tool,
go to autoparts store and find right bolt,
pull clutch,
insert bearing,
might as well change the serpentine belts while I'm in here since some ran it so you had to take a motor mount loose to do it,
pinch the supercharger belt because she is asking how much longer
go back and buy ANOTHER $32 belt,
and then reassemble in reverse order.

That sure shut her up.

Sometimes, I realize how truly blessed I am to be a bachelor.

Allow me to plagiarize something I read the other day… has anyone ever actually read Pride and Prejudice? Maybe that is why we cannot understand what they are thinking...

Here’s a tip I’ve never used: I understand you can learn a great deal about girldom by reading Pride and Prejudice, and I own a copy, but I have never read it. I tried. It was given to me by a girl with a little note that read: What is in this book is the heart of a woman. I am sure the heart of a woman is pure and lovely, but the first chapter of said heart is hopelessly boring. Nobody dies at all. I keep the book on my shelf because girls come into my room, sit on my couch, and eye the books on the adjacent shelf. You have a copy of Pride and Prejudice, they exclaim in a gentle sigh and smile. Yes, I say. Yes I do.
-Don Miller, Blue Like Jazz

-Michael

I loved this post...

this line literally gave me a bellylaugh:

Originally Posted by joesixpack

...Now, I don't know how to stop a wife from lecturing, but this morning, I learned a way (or, I should say, 'I learned yet another way ) to make it turn into a long argument that turns into the silent wife treatment. All you have to do is hold up your finger and say "Sush, woman. A simple 'thank you' will do"
...

...I feel your pain, brother, as soon as my stomach quits hurting from laughing so hard!

...thanks for that

-whatever

-Lou

For the exact reasons that you point out, I decided to try doing everything my wife asked me to do immediately upon her asking - you know, in an attempt to ward off the constant nagging and subsequent lecture etc..

Beware!! Do not take this step! All that happened was that she decided that this was a tacit admission that I was her slave. Extricating myself from that situation was twice as hard as weathering the nagging and lectures under my previous marital regime.

James (pity me gentlemen, pity me. )

Originally Posted by heliguy

Your a braver man than I

And I was sober when I said it, too. Sometimes I surprise myself

this pretty much sums it up...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1GjyrQiSRs