Thread: Canada... can somebody explain it to me?

Originally Posted by JMS

And you are appearently still feeling the effects of all those beers!

Whazzat ossifer? Nah, I alllays wear my pantses on my head while I'm druvvin!!!

Originally Posted by JimR

Whazzat ossifer? Nah, I alllays wear my pantses on my head while I'm druvvin!!!

You got me!

Originally Posted by JimR

I agree. Sleeman's is some of the best brew I've had, and I've had beer from a whole crapload of countries...

If you like that you should try Creemore Springs Lager.
Or Upper Canada Rebellion Lager. Sleeman own Upper Canada now anyhow.

Originally Posted by Jimbo

Canada: Australia, but with snow instead of beaches.

Originally Posted by JMS

In truth, no one can really explain Canada! Its a bit of an odd fluke actually!

Au Contraire. Canada was well thought out before creation.

Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for 6 days. Eventually Michael the Archangel found him, resting on the 7th day.

He inquired of God, "Where have you been?"

God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards, through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I’ve made."

Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

"It’s a planet," replied God, "and I’ve put LIFE on it. I’m going to call it EARTH and it’s going to be a great place of balance."

"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused.

God explained, pointing to the different parts of EARTH, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor. Over there, I’ve placed a continent of white people, and over there is a continent of black people." God continued, pointing to different countries, "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."

The Archangel, impressed by God’s work, then pointed to a large landmass in the top corner and asked, "What’s that one?"

"Ah," said God, "That’s Canada, the most glorious place on EARTH. There’s beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coast-line. The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they’re going to be found traveling the world. They’ll be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace."

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there will be balance?"

God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I’m putting next to them."

X

I thought you didn't believe in fairy tales X

Originally Posted by JMS

I thought you didn't believe in fairy tales X

That never stopped a good joke.

Now now, don't rip on Canada too much you Yanks, we'll need to burn down your damn Whitehouse again. :P

As for Canada's two official languages, that's basically a crock. As someone else said, it was a measure to appease part of our population. French is spoken broadly in Quebec, though there are still some predominantly English areas (especially in Montreal) and in some areas of NB. Elsewise, nobody pays it much mind. We're required to take French as a subject in Elementary school, but unless you plan to work for the Government it's more or less a waste of time if you live more than an hour west of Ottawa.

It was really a measure taken in an attempt to silence French seperatists, which was later followed by Quebec language laws dictating how much English they were allowed to display on sings in Quebec.

But seriously, if you're interested in Canada you should track down a book about our history, despite what a lot of pro-Americanization youth will tell you, it's actually pretty rich. We had a rebellion that took place in a bar! We fought back an American invasion. We built our nation on selling bizarre beaver fur top hats to the Brits.

Hell, and if you want to start making fun of the Canadian military, you might want to read up on some of it's exploits in WW1 and WW2. Check to see how many armies stood up to the gas attacks, who was used as the shock troops.

...

Sorry about my ranting, but yeah, in the youth in this area there has been a pretty big upsurge in pro-Americanization. It's not uncommon to hear things like "Canada has no culture" or "We have no history." Neither is true.

Oh, and as for Maple syrup, for that you need to get pure Lanark County maple syrup. Maple Syrup capitol of Ontario.

Originally Posted by xman

If you like that you should try Creemore Springs Lager.
Or Upper Canada Rebellion Lager. Sleeman own Upper Canada now anyhow.

+1 on the Creemore Xman!! In fact I'm drinking one right now (not joking). As for Upper Canada, to my knowledge it is completely defunct. I couldn't even find it when I was in Ontario/Toronto a few years back.

Originally Posted by Cobo

Now now, don't rip on Canada too much you Yanks, we'll need to burn down your damn Whitehouse again. :P

As for Canada's two official languages, that's basically a crock. As someone else said, it was a measure to appease part of our population. French is spoken broadly in Quebec, though there are still some predominantly English areas (especially in Montreal) and in some areas of NB. Elsewise, nobody pays it much mind. We're required to take French as a subject in Elementary school, but unless you plan to work for the Government it's more or less a waste of time if you live more than an hour west of Ottawa.

It was really a measure taken in an attempt to silence French seperatists, which was later followed by Quebec language laws dictating how much English they were allowed to display on sings in Quebec.

But seriously, if you're interested in Canada you should track down a book about our history, despite what a lot of pro-Americanization youth will tell you, it's actually pretty rich. We had a rebellion that took place in a bar! We fought back an American invasion. We built our nation on selling bizarre beaver fur top hats to the Brits.

Hell, and if you want to start making fun of the Canadian military, you might want to read up on some of it's exploits in WW1 and WW2. Check to see how many armies stood up to the gas attacks, who was used as the shock troops.
Sorry about my ranting, but yeah, in the youth in this area there has been a pretty big upsurge in pro-Americanization. It's not uncommon to hear things like "Canada has no culture" or "We have no history." Neither is true.

Oh, and as for Maple syrup, for that you need to get pure Lanark County maple syrup. Maple Syrup capitol of Ontario.

Well said, well put, especially from a member hailing from the home of Sleemans

Yeah, gotta watch those damn eskimos. Always shooting their mouths and ****ing people off (in reference to the noisy neighbors)

I can imagine Canada would have to be carriers of piece, what with your fierce navy


Sorry, it had to be done. Gosh, where's a mountie when you need one?

Back to your regular programming!

Nope, that wouldn't be one of ours .... ours are outfitted with 25HP outboards not trolling motors .... pretty close though!