Thread: Do you open doors?

car doors: never
building doors: yes

Originally Posted by fpessanha

.....I don't care what those bloody feminists think or say: 1) a gentleman is NEVER out of style; 2) equality of rights and opportunities has nothing to do with doors and general polite behaviour and respect; 3) if you hold a door open for anyone, no matter how small the gesture may be, you will be noticed and brighten a perhaps gloomy day in the land of the uncourteous. If not... the other person is but a turd and shouldn't be alive.

+1

I couldn't have put it better myself, and if I'd tried, I would have probably typed out half a page to say the same thing.

Wheres the vote for "I open doors for all women" ?

Originally Posted by Leighton

Wheres the vote for "I open doors for all women" ?

I'd just take the 4th option for that. If I tried to put every conceivable response in the poll, it would have been 100 choices long, and the results would have been incomprehensible.


Like I said, since there's only 4 choices, just choose the one that is closest. We're going for a general idea here.

once slammed a door on someone on their way out because they didn't thank me on the way in
not quite slam but the closer mechanism was a bit of a overachiever
had a few minutes to think about it while we were in line and I would have SWORN she gave me a dirty look when I opened the door for her

she didn't care that I held it on the way in but she sure cared that I let it go on the way out !!
it was a grate shot and connected with her tray of four cups and knocked them on the floor plus got her too

MAN that Starbucks coffee is EXPENSIVE !!! ($5 coffee? KMA!)[/QUOTE]

So you do it only for recognition and a thanks and not out of common courtisy? Then don't bother. IMO

i have allways opened doors for all women, children , dogs , cats i was brought up in a different age and will remain so.

Old world manners usually:

• Hold doors for women
• Women enter/exit elevators first
• Stand when a woman approaches the table (one should never remain seated for an introduction anyway)
• Walk on the outside towards the street when walking with a woman
• Don't do the car door thing - unless her arms are full (but I am usually carrying stuff)
• Step out of an elevator for others to exit - regardless of sex - versus having them shove past.
• Excuse myself when passing in front of someone in the store, when I pass between them and the shelf.
• I also do not answer cell phone calls when in meetings
• I send thank you notes to people
• If the waiter does not, I pull out the chair for a female guest - if more than one female (business meeting), I do it for the lady sitting to my right.

Do I think many of the people who receive this treatment are deserving? Probably not, but I am not doing it to impress them - I am doing it as it was how I was raised. I can only recall one time where the woman took issue - I think she was showing off for her friends that she was liberated. So I said "Please!" and allowed her to take the door and enter the building by herself. I then held the door for her friends - all who said "Thank you"...she ended up looking like a bitter shrew.

Whether you hold doors or not - the main purpose of good manners is not to make others feel uncomfortable. She indicated she wanted to open the door herself, so I allowed her to do so - the fact that she did it with no grace and in a nasty tone just made her look like an idiot.

Many people use manners to make other feel inferior - shame on them. Whether ordering wine, choosing a cigar, knowing which fork/knife/spoon/glass to use, knot a tie properly, fold a handkerchief, polish shoes, format a proper business letter, etc. - if you run into others who do not know, you should not make an effort to embarrass them; rather, you should assist them discretely.

Manners are like charity - if you are doing so you can be seen doing it - it has no meaning.

I was leaving a store one day with an elderly woman ahead of me. There was a young man of about 17 standing in the entrance and when he saw the woman approach, he opened the door for her. She seemed shocked and said ' "Thank you, so much" in a very surprised voice. His response was priceless: "Chivalry's not dead, ma'am. It just skipped a generation." And yes, I do open doors.

Originally Posted by leadduck

"Chivalry's not dead, ma'am. It just skipped a generation."

I love it!!

Originally Posted by WireBeard

Many people use manners to make other feel inferior - shame on them.

Shame on me?

The hell you say


BTW Paco, you didn't set me off.
I was just clarifying.