Thread: The loss of common courtesy?

Ed...

In my declining years I've grown to be less tolerant than you. I would have continued to back up and innocently knocked her headlight out with my bumper. When the cops show up, maybe she could explain why she left her car unattended in a traffic lane.

I do not allow rude people to go unchallenged. One of my pet peeves is holding a door open for someone and they walk past like you aren't even there. Loudly, I always say to the back of their head, "HEY, NO PROBLEM... YOU'RE WELCOME".

But for the most part... I think it's a California thing. Moreso than it would be in other states. I seem to always be pleased with the manners of people of any of the states below New York. No offense, Rich, but you guys are as bad as Californians. I take that back. NY residents aren't rude... they just don't care.

It's a good thing I don't go out much...

Originally Posted by urleebird

But for the most part... I think it's a California thing. Moreso than it would be in other states. I seem to always be pleased with the manners of people of any of the states below New York. No offense, Rich, but you guys are as bad as Californians. I take that back. NY residents aren't rude... they just don't care.

It's a good thing I don't go out much...

Bill,

I am sorry to say I can't disagree with you. I find this very difficult for me because I was raised by people who showed respect to others. I remember before I went to Paris 12 years ago people telling me the French were rude. I came back and told them they were just New Yorkers who spoke French. I also traveled for business in the US a while back and found in most big cities people where much nicer than in NY. They would say excuse me and good morning; for a while it blew my mind. I would find that after afew weeks away I would end up saying excuse me and good morning when I returned. Good manners and concern for others are taught by parents and society so keep on yelling at those inconsiderate people who walk through the doors without a thank you, I do...

Originally Posted by RichZ

...Good manners and concern for others are taught by parents and society...

Words of wisdom right there. I get to hear from my wife about all the little brats she has to put up with at her teaching job. She teaches 8th grade language arts and these kids shove each other in the halls, talk back to their teachers, sexually harass the girls (in the case of boys) and call it flirting, and yell at each other across the room in the middle of class while my wife is talking. I could never make it as a teacher because I would have thrown one of these kids through a window within the first week.

Anyway, for the most part I see and meet very polite people here in Portland. People hold the door for each other, they smile and acknowledge other people, say hello, and seem to give a damn as to how you're doing. I had the same experience in Montana when I went to college, so I'm wondering if it's something to do with regional cultures. On the other side of the coin, you see people going to operas and "formal shows" in jeans and a t-shirt so that isn't always a good thing.

Now my wife is telling me about this absolute nonsense called "attachment parenting" where the parent never puts their kid down and coddles them. No discipline, just lots of love. What kind of idiot dreamed up that insanity?

Alright, here's one:

As I was crossing a busy 'T' intersection in Toronto a lady was appoaching and preparing for her right turn. She did to things wrong. 1. Rolling Stop. 2. Didn't look right long enough to see me. As a result she plowed right into me with the side of her car. I managed to keep myself from sliding under by hammering my hand against her windshield. That's when she noticed me and jammed on the breaks. I've been under a car before and it was none too much fun that time. I don't want to repeat the experience. Needless to say I was livid. She managed to come to a halt a few metres away as I was walking after her. She even rolled down her passenger side window to engage with me in a less physical manner. Now I would have been perfectly within my right to tear a strip out of this woman. After all she hit me with her car (thankfully unhurt) but almost succeeded in running over me. Instead of screaming like a madman I simply told her, "You really gotta watch where you're going. Don't be in such a rush 'cuz next time it might not turn out so good". She appologised profusely and went on her way.

By not losing my head, and it was tough not to, she can't blame me for simply being an arrogant prick. She was unencumbered by an irrational emotional response and free to confront her potentially tragic error honestly. I hope she has taken that experience to heart. It's a technique I developed as an urban cyclist. The last thing we need is another motorist who feels justified in endangering "@$$hθ|ε" cyclist "taking up the road".

Of course other times I just scream as I'm going by something like, "Pick a lane" or, "Get off the phone"! I guess we can't all be perfect all the time.

X

Originally Posted by mgraepel

"attachment parenting" ... What kind of idiot dreamed up that insanity?

The one proud as heck about their model citizen children.

It people like that driver that keep me driving my lifted F250 pickup instead of getting a nice bmw or lexus, I might not look as stylish or professional, but I am damn safe.

Originally Posted by JLStorm

It people like that driver that keep me driving my lifted F250 pickup instead of getting a nice bmw or lexus, I might not look as stylish or professional, but I am damn safe.

I hear 'ya JL. I'd like to get an old 60s pickup and bolt a railroad tie on the front and back as a bumper. I'm used to people driving like idiots here in LA, it was just the sheer gaul of the lady to be so rude. I sure hope this isn't the way society is going but I'm afraid it is.

well guys I read your posts , now i really dont know what age group your in and its none of my business but i have noticed a few things on my travels, which include, the southern states in the good ol'usa, canada, Germany,Holland,Norway,Ireland,wales and of course England.

I come from a small fishing village in the North East of scotland, where people I think are at best good people...we are not near any cities, ( I have to drive at least 20m for a subway, burgerking and a macdonalds...a good thing sometimes)

Anyways my point.
1.Discipline...my house, a hot arse was administered when deserved...now a days in the UK you cant smack a child, what I hate most are these parents who make poor excuses, like oh he cant help it, hes only little and a wee bit bored...as he tears up and destroys everything in sight.Young kids nowadays seem to think they can please them selves and answer to no-one...
my opinion,a hot arse lets you know when youve messed up bad...

2.Morals, nowadays people think they can please themselves and go through life screwing people, there seems to be hardly anyone with any conscience these days.
My wife tells me I try to please too many people but if I say i will do something and i dont i feel guilty, people now just say 'f@@k em', i hate that

3.Manners, good manners cost nothing and since travelling across the pond to the USA and Canada, i noticed that people do have them, people my age refering to elders as Sir and Ma'am a thing not done here in the uk,i LIKE IT BECAUSE IT SHOWS A BIT OF RESPECT...btw there is now direct word for please in Norwegian... but thank you is totally OTT...thank you is Tusen Takk ( Thousand Thank yous')

as an aside friends Of my wifes from New Orleans and NY came over and visited with us for 4 days on a UK tour they were doing before one of them went on active duty on a US Aircraft Carrier as a Surgeon, what rank I dont know, but, they agreed on one thing, from leaving us, people became more rude and unhelpful the further south they went, their timing was unfortunate as in Edinburgh they caught the G8 Demo's and they were in LOndon at the time of the Bus Bombing and subway bombings, then of course Katrina when they returned home.

Well ive said my piece, Im a married 33yo with a 15 month old son...my time is coming....HELP..

REGARDS, SIMON

Originally Posted by mgraepel

Words of wisdom right there. I get to hear from my wife about all the little brats she has to put up with at her teaching job. She teaches 8th grade language arts and these kids shove each other in the halls, talk back to their teachers, sexually harass the girls (in the case of boys) and call it flirting, and yell at each other across the room in the middle of class while my wife is talking. I could never make it as a teacher because I would have thrown one of these kids through a window within the first week.

Anyway, for the most part I see and meet very polite people here in Portland. People hold the door for each other, they smile and acknowledge other people, say hello, and seem to give a damn as to how you're doing. I had the same experience in Montana when I went to college, so I'm wondering if it's something to do with regional cultures. On the other side of the coin, you see people going to operas and "formal shows" in jeans and a t-shirt so that isn't always a good thing.

Now my wife is telling me about this absolute nonsense called "attachment parenting" where the parent never puts their kid down and coddles them. No discipline, just lots of love. What kind of idiot dreamed up that insanity?

I agree. Now, the NBA finals...

RT

Its all a symptom of the breakdown of a society. people just care about #1 and are being brought up with an additude of don't take sh*** from anyone. People are just crazy and probably mentally ill also.

Here's some classic cases going right now that shows underlying problems of lack of courtesy:

1) the little girl in new york who got shot because 2 'gangstas' got into a staring match and both had guns and decided to win the 'gangsta' way. This suggests that access to guns doesn't guarantee a more polite society but we have to give way as well to the suggestion that the two 'gangstas' are a product of a society that glamorizes outlaws and outlaws guns (much the same way most states are doing in the u.s.)

2) How about the pyrotechnics technician that was charged with and convicted of over 100 counts of negligent homicide. I realise we need accountability but I think this is really excessive. It was an accident, due in part to the club owners failures. Some of the relatives of the victims are wanting the technician's MOTHER to suffer "as we have suffered". Why? What's that poor woman got to do with what happened? It's not her fault! We've gone from a society bent on justice to a society bent on vengance. Virtually everyone wants someone else to "suffer" and "pay" even when that person had nothing to do with whatever the issue at hand may be. We (the United States) are obsessed with causing pain to others and with so many laws preventing the cowards of society from hurting others the way they want the cowards use the laws and create more laws so that the judicial system has now become a weapon of 'legalized' crime. Our society criminalizes everyone and everyone wants vengance so the cycle continues.

Our government has gotten around the double jeapardy laws by trumping multiple charges for a single act, and most importantly by creating state versus federal charges. A cop kills a suspect, people rant, the state finds him not guilty, the federal government steps in on 'federal charges' for the exact same thing. A man points a gun at someone, it goes off (accidentally OR intentionally), he legally owned the gun but he's charged with 'felony with a firearm' 'illegal possesion of a fire arm' 'murder'/'attempted murder' 'assault with a deadly weapon' and God knows how many other charges. The illegal possesion is allowed because he possesed the gun while commiting a felony which is now illegal in most states whether you own the gun or not. MANY prosecuters use this method to convict law abiding citizens who are only defending themselves AND to rack up more convictions that will look good on their record when they go up for re-election.

With all this going on we wonder at lack of courtesy. It's not only the common person, it's the system as well. Our nation has a disease and no one wants a cure.

That's what I think is sad.