Thread: Fathers' Rights in Child Custody and High Conflict Divorce

Originally Posted by christophe

Also, from those who divorced, are in the process of doing so, or went through a very hard (conflicting) time with their partners:

what topics would you advise a soon-to-be-engaged or soon-to-be-married couple to seriously discuss ??

(for example, career vs family.... etc.)

I would recommend they discuss everything. Things that seem inconsequential can become huge stumbling blocks later. But definitely children/career, finances,
anything you can think of that could potentially be a problem should be discussed first.

Originally Posted by whavens

I would recommend they discuss everything. Things that seem inconsequential can become huge stumbling blocks later. But definitely children/career, finances,
anything you can think of that could potentially be a problem should be discussed first.

Yes, discuss everything. No detail is too insignificant.

But I would also add that it's important not to just listen to your future partner's answers, you have to watch her behavior. If she says that having a savings account is important, watch her and see if she acts that way. Does she have a savings account? When she spends your money or shared assets, does she do so carefully and conscientiously? Does she take her work seriously or does she make partying her priority? Does she apologize if she treats you badly? This one is very important. If she is incapable of admitting that she's wrong and apologizing for it, then the marriage will fail (if you're lucky). How did her last long term relationship end? Does she blame it all on her ex or does she accept some of the responsibility?

If a woman is reading this, these go both ways. They apply to men as well.