Thread: Are You Lonesome Tonight?

I just got off the phone with the mother of three guys that I used to work with and a daughter that I used to date. Her children are long gone from home with families of their own and her husband had passed away about a year ago and so she now lives alone.

I'd been trying to take some of the smoked Kielbasa that my son and I had made over to her. You see her family came from the Ukraine and my Kielbasa is as close to her traditional sausage as she's tasted in quite sometime.

Anyway she hadn't answered the door for a couple of days and being elderly I was worried so I knocked on a neighbors door and found that due to a knee replacement surgery she couldn't get up and about very well. So I left the sausage with the neighbor.

A few hours later I got a phone call from the mother thanking me for the gift. We started talking and well after an hour on the phone we both decided that we needed to get to things at hand.

Later in the conversation it dawned on me that even though she has many children who love her dearly and help her out and that she has wonderful neighbors and other friends she was still 'Lonely' and needed to talk to someone outside of her inner sphere.

Do you know someone who is 'Lonely Tonight'.

I doubt that this thread will last long but I'm glad that I started it.

Those times don't come all that often for me at least, but when they do I am glad I could be there for whoever I was talking to. That's why we always need to be kind and gentle in all our actions as we never know what battles someone is going through...

Yes there are a multitude of formerly married and aging persons of both genders who are lonesome most every night. Children have grown and their friends and children are involved in keeping their lives very busy. Some folks alienated their children through no fault of their own and some did it with malice a forethought.

There are only so many hours in a middle-aged day and the squeaky wheels get the attention.

A gift basket from time to time is a nice reminder that there are people who care.

Some of the PIFs from here and many back channel conversations help a lot.

There are many of you that do liven a persons life...a lot!

Be kind to your web footed friends!

Then there will be folks with whom you may enjoy your old age!
~Richard

I'll call the mother 'Mrs. B'

More than once Mrs. B Commented on how she couldn't believe that I remembered her and had brought her the sausage.

She'd told me that she was going to share it with her children. Well I'd thought that the sausage would just be for her and 5-6 ounces of Kielbasa wont' go far between her and her children so tomorrow when I get off work I'll take her a Sh*t pot to share.

I can always make more for myself and my family.

There are a few people on my route who I chit chat with a bit, here and there. Some of the older ones have some pretty neat stories to tell or love to talk about rival things.. I take 10-15 minutes (my break usually) and "chew the fat" with them. It seems to brighten their day and mine. One time I was delivering to a place and he was an older gent. His family was over visiting. I was bringing a parcel over to him. He stopped visiting with them to visit with me. Introduced me to his kids and grand kids. Was a tad awkward, but I enjoyed it. I actually got to put a face to some of the people who were in his stories.

living in a retiement community I know hundreds like that,wife cooks for them,I do alot of grocery shopping for them.

Thread might last longer than you think.

I tend to focus more on the youth than the elderly. I am always willing to meet and message with teens. In spite of being in constant electronic contact with others they tend to be a little lonely too while struggling to find who they are and what direction they may try to go in. Although it seems that the youth have more resources than ever before, they get lost far easier than in days gone by. I am grateful for all those that take the time to exchange some honest words with other people every day, in any age group. I think that part of what is not that great about out society is out lack of general concern for those around us. If you talked to someone who is lonely or offered advice to another or let someone in in traffic today celebrate the act of giving freely. One of my sponsors used to say the only way to be free is to give away what you want the most.

Compliments to all the above which enforces one of the things that makes this a nice place to drop by...it's Old School. I retired from L.E. about 15 years ago, (half-way through a 2nd career as administrator of a detention center for the same agency), and can attest to many of the comments and observations stated above. I cannot tell you how many calls I responded to over the years where I found someone up in years alone, confused and afraid with many having their family members living within relatively close proximity and how grateful they were to see you and especially appreciative if you took a little time, accepted a cup of coffee and offered a bit of conversation, looked at something they made or photos of their family after allaying their concern and the professional reason for the call ended.

A short time ago, I put up a pretty nice looking mailbox for my house, set it in a platform of exposed aggregate...the whole nine yards and within a few days a older fellow that lived across the way came by and told me how much his wife liked it and wondered where I purchased the goods. I told him and recognizing that he putting it up would be beyond him and that he'd have to hire someone who would likely skin him, told him when he was ready, I'd put it up for him and did with the same detail as my own. You'd have thought that I gave him tickets to Hawaii...he offered money...I refused, stating I enjoyed doing things like that, etc. Within 1-month, he passed away.

In my former vocation, aside from what I've mentioned above, too many times I've seen someone I knew or spoke to them only to hear of or respond to welfare check call to find them dead. You really never know what the next moment, day or year brings. As well, I've considered over the years that those who look beyond themselves and their individual cares...give of themselves to others are the types I enjoy and admire and that conversely, those who by their actions are concerned with only their well-being are the types I want no part of.

I'm glad I happened by this thread, reading your comments made it a better day.

Regards to each of you.

As long as I have my cats I am not lonely, they have been and always will be my best friends. Cudrunner, find that lady a kitty cat and she will never be lonely.