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Thread: Superman
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02-14-2010, 06:39 AM #1Irrelevant
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Superman
It's 2:23AM in Rochester, lightly snowing. If I was sane I'd be sleeping, but I can't figure out how Superman shaves. Not even a Filarmonica or a Duck should be able to slice through Kal-El's superwhiskers. Clark Kent should look like a ZZ Topper. I'm troubled.
Don't get hung up on hanging hairs.
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02-14-2010, 06:58 AM #2Senior Member
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He certainly used to use a mirror to reflect his heat vision back onto his beard which only seemed to grow when he'd been exposed to Red Kryptonite, but I haven't been keeping up with his latest exploits so this information maybe way out of date.
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02-14-2010, 08:10 AM #3The only straight man in Thailand
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I always assumed super man chewed his fingernails until they were jaggard and then scraped his whiskers off with his fingernails.
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02-14-2010, 10:53 AM #4The Great & Powerful Oz
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The heat vision story sounds way cooler... & more hygienic
“The white gleam of swords, not the black ink of books, clears doubts and uncertainties and bleak outlooks.”
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02-14-2010, 01:23 PM #5The only straight man in Thailand
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But wouldn't his heat vision just melt through the mirror?
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02-14-2010, 01:47 PM #6A Newbie....Forever!
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A more serious problem would be when he'd make love to Lois Lane and get a little too excited.........
The results could be desasterous! (lol)
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02-14-2010, 01:49 PM #7The only straight man in Thailand
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Lois would have to be more worried about what could happen if she got pregnant. What would happen with the baby started kicking?
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02-14-2010, 03:32 PM #8Senior Member
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More than likely he uses the Northern forest (Paul Bunyan) technique of beating the whiskers inward and then biting them off. Dovo and TI have not been tickled to learn of this technique, which is just too bad, as it does result in the perfect BBS "shave" without benefit of any mechanical contrivance.
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02-14-2010, 05:37 PM #9Super Shaver
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xman to the rescue ...
I have seen this depicted in comics so it must be true.
Originally Posted by AlanII
Well, he's Superman so he can control his heat vision to produce just the right amount of heat which is light anyway so it's reflected by the mirror. Originally Posted by ndw76
As for haircuts ... this was all I could find.
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02-14-2010, 07:41 PM #10Senior Member
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So far, that maxim has never let me down. I do love this song though. Originally Posted by xman
YouTube - Ain't No Such Thing As A Superman by Gil Scott Heron
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