Thread: Chuck Norris

Well, if Chuck can divide by 0 I've got no doubt he can count to infinity! Of course, I'm sure he's able to achieve all this because he knows his limits! (sorry, small maths joke there - feel free not to laugh)

James.

Originally Posted by Jimbo

Well, if Chuck can divide by 0 I've got no doubt he can count to infinity! Of course, I'm sure he's able to achieve all this because he knows his limits! (sorry, small maths joke there - feel free not to laugh)

James.

James, there are some here (me) who are not mathematically inclined. Please make your jokes appropriate to the lowest common denominator

Ilike this one:

There's no theorie of evolution...only a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Originally Posted by Bear

-Chuck Norris can divide by zero...loved it (although my wife didn't get it)

That one is my favorite as well. I saw it on a T-shirt once, I might have to try and get that one.

Originally Posted by Jimbo

Of course, I'm sure he's able to achieve all this because he knows his limits!

uggghh! Clever, but I really hate puns...
And I was never too fond of calculating limits, either...

-Michael

Originally Posted by steve

James, there are some here (me) who are not mathematically inclined. Please make your jokes appropriate to the lowest common denominator

Originally Posted by ohlookaneagle

...
uggghh! Clever, but I really hate puns...
And I was never too fond of calculating limits, either...

-Michael

Sorry, sorry. Will do better next time. How about:

"If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death. "

or

"Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it."

(from http://www.duckshit.com/chuck-norris-jokes/)

James.

Thanks for adding that link Jimbo. If anyone finds more good chuck norris sites let us know so we can share in the laughs.

Steve,

Humans conceptualize the concept of infinity to varying degrees, ranging from mathematical representations to religious and philosophical abstracts.

Computers, not so much. They choke. Dividing anything by zero gives you an answer of infinity, which of course Chuck can do, even on an abacus.

My favorite Chuck Norris quip is on that top 100 list. It is this one;

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

I like it's subtlety. - John

Originally Posted by Namdnas

Steve,

Humans conceptualize the concept of infinity to varying degrees, ranging from mathematical representations to religious and philosophical abstracts.

Computers, not so much. They choke. Dividing anything by zero gives you an answer of infinity, which of course Chuck can do, even on an abacus.

My favorite Chuck Norris quip is on that top 100 list. It is this one;

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

I like it's subtlety. - John

I guess it was a very poor attempt at humo(u)r on my part (you know, LCD and such). Sorry. I won't try as hard next time

No, you know, now that I think about it, it was good. I simply missed it. My bad. - John

Chuck Norris doesn't read lines wrong, he corrects them.