Our relations have a tradition here at the ranch on the North face of Wheeler peak. You see, there is this mean Black Bear we call Ned who gives us trouble all year long. He be big and mean so knowing where his den is and since he be hibronatin we roust him and when he comes out he be so groggy we just knock him over and roll him down the mountain and then run the other way.

Maybe that's why he be so mean and ornery and of bad disposition.

I won't be participating this year so I wish the youngsters well.