Thread: The loss of common courtesy?

One of my pet peeves is holding a door open for someone and they walk past like you aren't even there. [-Bill]

Exactly! I hate that more than any...well...a lot of things.

Loudly, I always say to the back of their head, "HEY, NO PROBLEM... YOU'RE WELCOME". [-Bill]

As for the "you're welcome" bit, I also do it, but in a normal tone of voice and with a polite smile on my face. That makes'em feel absolutely the worst [-FiReSTaRT]

I also do this, but I tend to say it in a manner somewhere between the two. Maybe just loudly enough that I think they'll hear me as I turn around.

I was raised in Texas, and I was raised to be a Gentleman. I hold doors without expecting a "thank you", but appreciating it when it happens. I allow cars to change lanes in front of me, and hope when necessary, someone will do the same for me. I open car doors for ladies. I give up my seat to ladies and my elders. I treat others with respect, regardless of how they treat me. It's not bragging, it's how I was raised. As far as I am concerned, a "thank you" is nice, but in my opinion, it's more important for me to to what I was taught is "the right thing". I believe that all of the books by John Bridges should be required reading. I don't believe that a gentleman needs a gun to settle an argument. I don't get involved in arguments. But pull a gun on me...well, I've got a surprise for you. And I promise, you will NOT like it.

Being a gentleman and practicing chivalry are not macho things. They are a way of life that involves respect. And if someone chooses to disrespect me, it's their loss. I have nothing to prove to anyone, except to me. And that is the fact that I am in control of myself, my feelings and how I react. Want to piss me off? Give it a shot. You'll just frustrate yourself. I think my signature says it all.

RT

Originally Posted by rtaylor61

I believe that all of the books by John Bridges should be required reading.

RT,

I have several of John Bridges books and recommend them highly. They're very well written, easy to read, and make excellent high school graduation gifts.

Ed

Originally Posted by EdinLA44

RT,

I have several of John Bridges books and recommend them highly. They're very well written, easy to read, and make excellent high school graduation gifts.
Ed

Good idea!

RT

We in Germany are facing exactly the same rude and unsocial behaviour.

E.g.: You drive on the "Autobahn", speed limit is 130 km/h, you take over a car with 140 km/h and an idiot in an "Audi TT" stucks his nose nearly right into my backbumper and flashes with his lights.
Well, remembering your excellent concept of "a gentlemen" to which I really try to adhere, I gave this idiot a friendly wave with my hand and ...
he waved back an smiled. Not bad.

4 kilometers later I saw him standing on the parking place fumbling in his papers facing two police officers ...


You see, quite the same in good old Germany ...

Arnd

RT,
You sir, are a very wise man. I think that anyone
would be lucky to call you a friend.


Terry

Originally Posted by rtaylor61

I was raised in Texas, and I was raised to be a Gentleman. I hold doors without expecting a "thank you", but appreciating it when it happens. I allow cars to change lanes in front of me, and hope when necessary, someone will do the same for me. I open car doors for ladies. I give up my seat to ladies and my elders. I treat others with respect, regardless of how they treat me. It's not bragging, it's how I was raised. As far as I am concerned, a "thank you" is nice, but in my opinion, it's more important for me to to what I was taught is "the right thing". I believe that all of the books by John Bridges should be required reading. I don't believe that a gentleman needs a gun to settle an argument. I don't get involved in arguments. But pull a gun on me...well, I've got a surprise for you. And I promise, you will NOT like it.



Being a gentleman and practicing chivalry are not macho things. They are a way of life that involves respect. And if someone chooses to disrespect me, it's their loss. I have nothing to prove to anyone, except to me. And that is the fact that I am in control of myself, my feelings and how I react. Want to piss me off? Give it a shot. You'll just frustrate yourself. I think my signature says it all.

RT

Amen. Expecting a pat on the back when you do what you're supposed to do anyway is like expecting a raise for doing the bare minimum at work. It's nice when people are considerate enough to notice your efforts, and return them with kindness, but if they don't...well, that just lets you know those aren't people who are worth the effort of worrying over. Demanding that someone notice how "great" you are only demeans you and cheapens your effort to be a decent human being. It also drives you crazy, because no matter how well-known, famous, skilled, or "cool" you are, there are always going to be people who, for whatever reason, don't like you. If you know you did the right thing, and treated the other person with respect, how they respond is immaterial and irrelevant (outside physical confrontation). It's their problem, and as long as they don't threaten or assault me, it will remain their problem. Demanding someone notice your efforts at common courtesy is just as bad as them not noticing it in the first place, if not worse, because they might've been distracted or worrying over something else when they failed to notice your courtesy, but your demanding recognition indicates you worry about it far too much, and that you need external reinforcement to do what is right and proper. It's aggravating at times, but if say, a woman doesn't say "thank you" when I open the door for her, I don't really take offense...I take comfort in the fact she probably has a much harder time sleeping at night than I do.

Originally Posted by Arnd

4 kilometers later I saw him standing on the parking place fumbling in his papers facing two police officers ...


Arnd

I do always enjoy it when an idiot gets what is coming to them.

I tend to disagree with you on this count gentlemen: If someone does something nice for me, I always thank them for it. That is a proper display of manners and expected from either a lady or a gentleman. A polite "you're welcome" is proper admonishment for them to remember their P's and Q's.

Originally Posted by FiReSTaRT

I tend to disagree with you on this count gentlemen: If someone does something nice for me, I always thank them for it. That is a proper display of manners and expected from either a lady or a gentleman. A polite "you're welcome" is proper admonishment for them to remember their P's and Q's.

I totally agree, but if someone fails to do so...no big deal, at least to me. I do everything within my power to not let others effect me and how I react.

RT

(Athough there was that one chat session with Brian...who remains HIGH on my list as the "least" gentlemanly person I have ever crossed, and should we ever meet face to face, WILL face my wrath and learn how to administer his own sutures, once the hospital releases him.)