Thread: Smart-Ass answers

There is nothing like putting very sharp cold steel to your throat to teach you perspective.



It's like meditating only with more adrenaline.

This is how REAL men shave...

"Dude, why're you shaving with a straight razor?"

It worked so good with your sister I thought I'd try it for myself

Originally Posted by sicboater

1. 1/5 the blades, Twice the man.

Unless you tape 5 Straight razors together and use that. Gillete Fusion, eat your hear out (hey, I might just try that)!

As for the response, I would have gone with, "I'm shaving with this because it's too expensive to fill up my chainsaw."

Originally Posted by jockeys

When asked why I use a straight razor, I simply reply that Chuck Norris uses a machete, but since I'm not as awesome as he is, I'm forced to use the next best thing.

What about Steven Segall?

"Why do you shave with a straight razor?"

"you know, I'm glad you asked me that because a few other folks have asked me the same thing and it reminds me, Ive gotta think of an answer! Thank you!"

Although a few of the other answers here a pretty good also.


Dave

judging by his physical degradation, I would say he decided to go for the pork chops and gave up on personal hygiene altogether.

Why do you shave with a straight razor?

I have too much blood, I need to get some of it out periodically.

I've always wanted a thin face, this way I shave some cheek off every morning.

Q: Why are you using a straight razor?

A: What? This? Oh, it's not a razor, it's just a really worn out comb.

A: Are you trying to say I should be using some kind of gay razor? You prick.

A: There are other kinds of razors?

A: Oh, I don't know... Why does anyone shave with what they do? What made you choose the Venus Devine?

A: I tried using a Mach 3 once, but I thought it was giving me a rash. Turned out I was sprouting a vagina so I thought I better stop.

A: I was planing on taking a leak later, would you like to critique how I do that as well?

A: (move razor away from throat and grab area you were shaving, start screaming) Gaaaaaaaah! Gaaaaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaaaaaah! And that's why you don't bother someone with a razor blade against their neck!

A: What's up next? Whether I wear jockeys or briefs?

A: I once tried using a disposable... but I got disposable confused with edible. I'm not making that mistake again!

A: I think safety razors are for the physically or mentally disabled... Why? What do you use? (you need to use a super innocent voice for that one)

A: I used to use a little weasel with super big teeth, but I got sick of it's "You think you have a tough job" and "It's a living" comments. (Flintstones? Anyone?)

Actual suggested answer: Because once you get over the first couple shaves learning curve, it provides a very nice, comfortable shave, not to mention how close it is. Besides, I enjoy the old timey aspects of it. It's actually a lot easier and safer than it looks, you should give it a try some time. I'd be more than happy to give you any advice or help you may need.

Q. Why the hell do you use a straight razor?

A. Because I can.....




v/r

Allen