Thread: The Finest Shaver in the World

Originally Posted by Mike_ratliff

What you seek is is the one razor... The great razor smiths of the second age forged 16 razors of power with the help of a dark and twisted master grinder.
The greatest razor smith of the day created 3 more razors, and the twisted master grinder made one final ultimate razor for himself.



The history of these razors is aparent, as is their legacy.
The 7 razors of the honing lords have the power to attract great collections of razors, although their ability to shave is not known, what is known is that 4 of the 7 have been lost or destroyed, most likely killed by the dreaded faucet. Of the 7 two are believed to be owned by Lynn and Crichton respectively. The location of the third is unknown.

The 3 rings of the razor kings have been well hidden since their creation, and are not influenced by the others. These are believed to be in the posession of Chandler Zowada and Williams, (although this has never been confirmed)

The 9 razors for mortal men, have drifted through history and the owner is unlikely to admit that he has one of the razors of power, but it is easy to tell by his obsession with a perfect shave. Many of these razors have names like "Mack the knife"...
I believe I had one of the 9 in my posession about a year ago, but alas it slipped through my fingers before I had recognised it for what it really was. (It was cleverly disguised as a 7/8 W&B frameback.)

And finally the one razor... I am dilligently working to prove that I am in posession of this razor, but it has eluded my attempts to unveil it. It clearly holds power over all razors in it's presence, providing the most superlative shaves imaginable... But stubbornly remains disguised as a Henckels 8/8 square point in plain black scales.

One razor to rule them all..?

Oh c'mon, you had to know that book was based on reality...
Of course the dark lord of the razors was not defeated when his finger was cut off...
this is a cleaned up version for those of weaker constitutions, and should have never been "edited for content" It is an important lesson for all those shavers out there who insist on shaving in the buff.

M_r,

Your reference to one's dress while shaving prompts me to ask who bothers to get dressed after the pre-shave shower so that one can get lather all over their recently donned garb?

One need not get fully dressed, but at least cover the appendage one values most...



The dark shaving lord's destruction is well documented through out history...
It coencided with the world's first sex change operation...

THe books are also a prophetic warning, why do you think the dark shaving lord was defeated by a "Hobbit"?

Because in the second coming of the dark lord he would be defeated by a Bobbit... before he could attain his razor of power...

Them Bobbits will get you every time!

Hey Mike thats great stuff!!!!

Errr..... Is that the bit he cut of in his right hand?

That's why I keep a fig leaf in my bathroom.

Originally Posted by RayG

That's why I keep a fig leaf in my bathroom.

A fig leaf is large enough? I have to use a couple of palm fronds at minimum!

Originally Posted by JMS

A fig leaf is large enough? I have to use a couple of palm fronds at minimum!

Shaving excites you that much?