Thread: Societal Norms Discussion

I would say common...

Coming from country (small town) Queensland in Australia you get used to having any amount of space around you and not coming anywhere near physical contact with another person unless you intend to...

I struggled for a little while when i was posted to Malaysia and then Singapore because the space around you is reduced dramatically and people seem to be very used to pushing their way through crowds and standing shoulder to shoulder on public transport.

When you're the odd one out in such a situation you seem to swing between being offended and causing offence... takes a few weeks to get used to it...

Greg Frazer

Originally Posted by Jonedangerousli

Another norm: Personal Space.

Every quarter my company has an off-site meeting for our executive management team. We have a golf outing on Sunday, meetings Mon & Tues. Dinner each night, poker (excuse me, bridge (HR says we can't say poker, even though our Director of HR is often a bigger winner, LOL)) games after dinner. Drinks, cigars, etc.

My wife and I have made a tradition of going to the meeting a day early for a mini-vacation. A chance to rest and relax away from home. She goes home on Sunday morning to prepare for the next week.

This quarter we are at a resort at Lake Lanier Islands just north of Atlanta. When we arrived yesterday morning we found the hotel packed full with a gathering of people from India. It is some type of organized event. When I say packed I'm not exaggerating. All of the common areas are literally packed with people. It's very difficult to even walk down the hallway. There will be 10-12 people, adults, teens, small children walking towards you. Normally here when this situation occurs people move to the right of the hall and everyone passes. Several times we've almost had to fight our way through. I remember studying differences in personal space but is this common in other areas?

I'd say yes. I've noticed several aspects which seem related...

One is the right/left thing you mentioned. Americans assume people will tend to stay to their right so oncoming pedestrians (or cars, for that matter) can pass to their left. But people from countries that drive on the left tend to move to their left, not their right. Anywhere its really crowded, or in poorer countries (where there aren't a lot of cars) it's a free-for all... pedestrians, cyclists, and cars simply "take what they can get" from a right-of-way perspective. So when I've had to drive in Manhattan during rush hour or do the Arch de Triumph circle in Paris, I simply have learned to change my attitude to drive by their rules... after all, I'm in their "culture" at that moment.

Another is that many countries don't have the same concepts as Americans about "first-come, first-served" and "yield the right of way"... instead it's "whoever is stronger or has the most guts wins". Eg, ever notice what happens in a ski lift line in some parts of Europe... certainly nothing orderly by American standards. Or at some of those wide intersections in Buenos Aires... 10 lanes striped on the pavement but traffic lined up forming 13 lanes?

And many cultures throughout the world treat open space as public, whereas Americans treat almost all property as owned by someone... so in Mexico, for example, you would expect the neighbor children to be playing in your front lawn if it isn't fenced.

Originally Posted by azjoe

Another is that many countries don't have the same concepts as Americans about "first-come, first-served" and "yield the right of way"... instead it's "whoever is stronger or has the most guts wins". Eg, ever notice what happens in a ski lift line in some parts of Europe... certainly nothing orderly by American standards. Or at some of those wide intersections in Buenos Aires... 10 lanes striped on the pavement but traffic lined up forming 13 lanes?

And many cultures throughout the world treat open space as public, whereas Americans treat almost all property as owned by someone... so in Mexico, for example, you would expect the neighbor children to be playing in your front lawn if it isn't fenced.

I guess it just gos to show that americans are more civilized,huh?

Originally Posted by JMS

I guess it just gos to show that americans are more civilized,huh?

I didn't mean it to sound that way... if it did, I apologize. I just meant that not all cultures see the same situation the same way... so what's right/wrong often has a lot to do with where you are.

Originally Posted by azjoe

I didn't mean it to sound that way... if it did, I apologize. I just meant that not all cultures see the same situation the same way... so what's right/wrong often has a lot to do with where you are.

I know you didn't. I was just swinging a bat at the hornets nest!

Originally Posted by JMS

I know you didn't. I was just swinging a bat at the hornets nest!

From what I've seen.....Joe's job is tough enough without instigators!..

Azjoe

hornet-herder

-whatever

-Lou

Originally Posted by scarface

From what I've seen.....Joe's job is tough enough without instigators!..

Azjoe

hornet-herder

-whatever

-Lou

Sorry! Sometimes I just can't help myself.

I've noticed a little of that right here in North America. I grew up in the east where we have one sense of how much personal space people get, but when I first went to the prairies people gave each other a larger personal space than I was used to.

X

I agree with Greg re Australian personal space. It's one of those subtle yet noticable things that cropped up for us in the UK and Europe (although spending 22 hours in economy on a 747 helped ease the transition ). And because we lived over there for a relatively long time, it cropped up again for us when we came back to Australia too.

We found the personal space issue is also reflected in the architecture (although it is a bit chicken or egg I guess). In Australia, fully detached homes are more usual, except perhaps in inner city areas, for example. Things tend to go up in the UK whereas in Australia they tend to go out, although in cities this is changing.

James.

Personal space.

Same as everyone else.
Growing up in the woods there was no real excuse for someone to stand real close to you and such "intrusions" into your "comfort zone" would
normally be solved in short order with a wisecrack along the lines of

" If you're lookin for someone to take long hot showers with you got the wrong guy."
or
" Damn son, are you wearing perfume?"
or
" Hey man, I like you and all but you got the wrong hole to be standing that close Chuck!"
or
" Hey man, do you notice how everyone else is standing closer together than we are?" (good if you two are the only ones there)
or
"If you grab my ass and I swear I'll cut you."
or the classic
"Wow dude, you smell that fart?"
or a variation of the classic
" I had (insert food) corn flakes for breakfast. Does that fart smell like corn flakes to you?"
or
shout like you had been startled and when they ask what happened tell them
" Dude, I just looked up and you were like 4 inches away from me!!"

as far as what side to pass on
a person would think that driving rules would apply
oncoming traffic passes on the left, slower traffic keep right, wide loads should have amber flashers....