Thread: Losing all hope for humanity...

Originally Posted by ShavedZombie

I was hit, I am not messed up -

You're not ? How many strops ya got ? sorry ..... couldn't resist even if it is the pot calling the kettle black.

It is sad that young ones are like that,my brothers and I were raised by the "spare the rod,spoil the child" motto and at times there were bars of soap in the mouth sessions to clean those "filthy" words out.I believe in discipline but i as well believe in communication with my son, we talk about the situation which is helpful to me to understand whats going on in his head.In short it's a balance of both, at 17 yrs of age he still holds doors open for his elders,is polite,respectful and helpful.

Then you're doing it right, Deryan

Originally Posted by JimmyHAD

You're not ? How many strops ya got ? sorry ..... couldn't resist even if it is the pot calling the kettle black.

.... I cannot argue this point.. I'm not a bad person, then. Hitting me didn't make me a skinhead/thug/whatever media says hitting your kids causes... My personality just craves enabling, and AD's are great enabling...

Every time my parents or SWMBO say that I spend too much on "those leather thingies" I respond along the lines of "I could sell them for crack..." "Well, it's 50$ for a strop, or 50$ for weed... Which would you rather I bought?"... things to that extent... or just point out that I already paid, in advance, for my part of tuition -Got a lot of scholarships and decent loans, then went half in on the difference with my parents- and that any money spent on shaving is spent after seeing to my responsibilities... That last one is the best, because, when you watch their faces, they can't decide whether to be disappointed I spend so much on strops, or proud that I put the money I owe before the things I want...

They look so confused

Originally Posted by Sailor

That is one reason why i do not watch much TV these days. Of thousands of crap series there is it is really hard to find single one that would show 'normal' life interesting. It is too easy for the kids with no guidance or sense of realism to get confused or to take these shows too seriously.

I'm not for any kind of censorship either. It is just that young kids need adults to explain them things. To spend time with them. Not just to leave them on their own.

When the crap gets my attention I resort to the proof of
purchase of a competitors product that I see advertised.
I tape it to a hand written letter -- with a simple note
you are sponsor of a program that offended me (day time station)
to the point that I went and purchased a competitors product.

Now the proof of purchase bit is hard to do with automobiles
and yachts but it is way easy to do for beer and other products.

For each bad boy letter I do make it a point to draft a
couple good positive letters to balance my karma.

I can tell ya that a hand written letter -- good paper, fountain pen,
short and to the point goes a long way. Good companies pay attention
when you take some time to let them know.

Hmmm this is one that bothers me.

I work one of my jobs in retail security, now a few months ago we caught a young boy shoplifting, he was seven, and in the city centre on his own a considerable ways from his home where his parents were, he spoke barely any english, that smacks of parents not really looking after their kids or teaching them, now if I had been caught theiving at seven my folks woulda smacked me blind......

Also I have a teenage nephew, he is by far one of the cheekiest, workshy ignorant abusive little.......... treasures I have met, he regularly bunks off school he drinks, doesnt bother doing his work and is no use around the house, personally I think he needs a smack, but my sister for some bizare reason has no backbone in this area, however she will scream and shout and argue with him like he's an adult or she's a child, I'm not sure which..

I have seen in recent years a severe lack of discipline, and I have also noticed the trend of teenage parents "trying" to be "friends" to their kids, letting them run riot and having no regard. Mind you also working in retail security I see a lot of well to do supposedly respectful people allowing their kids to run riot sometimes endangering themselves, and when I point it out, which I do regularly, they look at you like you're crazy.

I see a lack of discipline across the board, from the teenage parents trying to be their kids best mate to the older parents who basically have no interest in punishing their child. Kinna sadens me.

I am now mid twenties. Before I was 12 I could cook clean and iron, and I don't mean tidy, I mean deep clean a kitchen lol, my parents indoctrinated me into a work ethic lol, I think more kids need this, a push into respect for themselves, others and the need to earn things.

The upshot for me is I have worked for the same company for 10 years, whilst also putting myself through college and uni, I am respectful to elders, I am polite to almost everyone, I hold open doors, I wish perfect strangers a nice day if I am in a situation were I need to communicate, and the truth is as a kid I was well smacked when I stepped out of line.

Geek

As a teacher I think that most kids would benifit from a good hiding. But the sad rule which we all know and hate is that you can't smack other people's children.

Originally Posted by ShavedZombie

I disagree... Parents need to be MORE afraid of screwing their kids up, and realize that NOT punishing them IS what's screwing them up.

I agree with everything else you said... But kids have to start getting hit >.<

I was hit, I am not messed up -outside of personality quirks that are native to me, not produced by environment- and I am actually quite proud to say my father disciplined me well, so I can behave well/respectably. And I will do the same to my kid.

Just my feelings though

Thats what I meant, I just worded it wrong. I meant to say, parents need to stop believing that discipline, structure, and rules are what screw their kids up.
I remember one time when I was very young, I was acting up, so while walking home my mom gave me a spank, and some jerk decided to criticize my mother, and even though my butt hurt, I still replied "you leave her alone, I was bad"

Originally Posted by TheGeek

Hmmm this is one that bothers me.

I work one of my jobs in retail security, now a few months ago we caught a young boy shoplifting, he was seven, and in the city centre on his own a considerable ways from his home where his parents were, he spoke barely any english, that smacks of parents not really looking after their kids or teaching them, now if I had been caught theiving at seven my folks woulda smacked me blind......

Also I have a teenage nephew, he is by far one of the cheekiest, workshy ignorant abusive little.......... treasures I have met, he regularly bunks off school he drinks, doesnt bother doing his work and is no use around the house, personally I think he needs a smack, but my sister for some bizare reason has no backbone in this area, however she will scream and shout and argue with him like he's an adult or she's a child, I'm not sure which..

I have seen in recent years a severe lack of discipline, and I have also noticed the trend of teenage parents "trying" to be "friends" to their kids, letting them run riot and having no regard. Mind you also working in retail security I see a lot of well to do supposedly respectful people allowing their kids to run riot sometimes endangering themselves, and when I point it out, which I do regularly, they look at you like you're crazy.

I see a lack of discipline across the board, from the teenage parents trying to be their kids best mate to the older parents who basically have no interest in punishing their child. Kinna sadens me.

I am now mid twenties. Before I was 12 I could cook clean and iron, and I don't mean tidy, I mean deep clean a kitchen lol, my parents indoctrinated me into a work ethic lol, I think more kids need this, a push into respect for themselves, others and the need to earn things.

The upshot for me is I have worked for the same company for 10 years, whilst also putting myself through college and uni, I am respectful to elders, I am polite to almost everyone, I hold open doors, I wish perfect strangers a nice day if I am in a situation were I need to communicate, and the truth is as a kid I was well smacked when I stepped out of line.

Geek

I work in a bicycle shop on the upper west side of manhattan, so I see the same type of thing all the time. Parents being their kids friends. Damn you doctor Phil.

Children Learn What They Live

If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight
If a child lives with fear, he learns to be apprehensive
If a child lives with pity, he learns to feel sorry for himself
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy
If a child lives with jealousy, he learns to feel guilt
BUT
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns to be confident
If a child lives with praise, he learns to be appreciative
If a child lives with acceptance, he learns to love
If a child lives with honesty, he learns what truth is
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith in himself and those about him
If a child lives with friendliness, he learns the world is a nice place in which to live

WITH WHAT IS YOUR CHILD LIVING?

Dorothy Law Nolte (1924 - 2005)

I'm a new parent my daughter is 2 1/2 and my son is due in July, and I will tell you it starts at a very young age, I see other people treat their kids like their adults.

It starts very young, creating boundaries, understanding what's ok, what's not ok, learning that mommy and daddy make the rules, not the kids. We don't listen at this age we tell them what to do, eventually that will change but not drastically.

I'll tell a story my dad was an MP at CheckPoint Charlie in Berlin for over ten years, when I was a kid if I wasn't getting up for school, he'd come in doing that military bugle call, then if I didn't get up after that he's flip the mattress over with me in it.

I had jobs since being a kid, etc... I'm a big fan of teaching your kids responsibility, and making them self sufficient, I think hitting your kids isn't necessarily the answer, I'm not against it per se, just feel sometimes you can make them have that respect without raising your hand.

Obviously with my daughter I don't or wont be raising any hands, perhaps with my son, sometimes it's a necessary evil, and has to be done, but perhaps I won't have to head down that road.

Either way my kids aren't my friends, we can be friends when their in the 30's but they'll still be my kids.

I'm very traditional in that way,not a fan of that Dr. Phill bs.

cheers
David