Thread: Problems? Ask Aunty Jimbo.

Originally Posted by pixelfixed

Great thread this,I have so many questions I really have pondered my entire life.
Dear aunty Jimbo< Do Chickens have lips?

Dear "Chicken Lover",

I know that chickens have breasts and a parson's nose. I did once see a chicken with lips. It belonged to the strange man down the road. Although that could have been his wife, now that I think about it.

Originally Posted by ace

Dear Aunty Jimbo,

Please help me with this. I am so confused.

If it is true that there is an exception to every rule, is that a rule itself?
If it is, then it has to have an exception, but if that is the case then the
rule that says every rule has an exception has an exception itself and that
would mean that not every rule would have to have an exception.

That's got me so messed up today that I'm not even going to go fishing.

Dear "Messed Up",

Yes, there is an exception to every rule. However, don't forget that rules were meant to be broken. This is also a rule. So when there is an exception to the exception of a rule we use the rules are meant to be broken rule to rule out exceptions to breaking of rules, with the exception of the broken rule itself, which has already had an exception applied to it.

Aunty Jimbo.

Originally Posted by thebigspendur

Dear Auntie

What is the value of Pi out to infinity?

Dear "Pi Man",

Dear Uncle Jimbo (God rest his soul) once said to me "I have discovered a proof that the decimal representation of Pi is random!" Of course, he was high on the wacky tobaccy at the time. But in answer to your question, if the value of Pi to an infinite number of digits were known the fabric of the very Universe would unravel. Sometimes it is best to just have a nice cup of tea and leave the Universe alone.

Aunty Jimbo.

Is it possible to mail a menu with food stamps?

Dear Aunty Jimbo,

Why can't you get good pastrami outside of NYC?

Why did my best friend of 42 years have to die before me?

When will Santa bring me the bike he promised when I was 7?

Where are the flying cars....they promised us flying cars?

Originally Posted by Wullie

Is it possible to mail a menu with food stamps?

Certainly you can but it is not very economical. First you have to use the food stamps to buy cigarettes. Smoke a couple of the cigarettes to curb your hunger and then sell the remainder of the carton for a discounted price. Use that money to buy a stamp and an envelope and if you have enough left over for a pint get that. Put the menu in the envelope, address it properly, and attach the stamp.

Not hard at all!

Dear Aunty Jimbo --
Should mirrored contact lenses be worn indoors?

Originally Posted by jaswarb

Maybe where you live....I was brought up shooting rabbits and the gun wasn't aimed at my.......well okay I understand but I don't have to like. Something ain't right about them auzzies anyway. The whole country started as either cops or robbers and they all live upside down, drink too much beer, surf, and play with a lopsided football wearing no safety equipment.

I am almost an Aussie! I live in Texas! Can I be an honorary Aussie?

............ Where is Auntie Jimbo with the answers? Inquiring minds need to know!

Originally Posted by sharptonn

............ Where is Auntie Jimbo with the answers? Inquiring minds need to know!

Asleep ya SILLY GIT!

I think auntie jimbo sobered up . . . or is
sleeping it off.