Thread: off topic anonymous

What's a "dugong ".... A new sex toy ????

dugong

I just got this in from a lady friend of mine. Who'd have thought that 'she' would send it along

FLAWLESS MALE LOGIC...


Woman:
Do you drink beer?

Man:
Yes

Woman:
How many beers a day?

Man:
Usually about 3

Woman:
How much do you pay per beer?

Man: $5.00 which includes a tip

(This is where it gets scary!)

Woman:
And how long have you been drinking?

Man:
About 20 years, I suppose

Woman:
So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each month at $450. In one year, it would be approximately $5400 correct?
Man:
Correct

Woman:
If in 1 year you spend $5400, not accounting for inflation, the past 20 years puts your spending at $108,000, correct?

Man:
Correct

Woman:

Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari?

Man:
Do you drink beer?
Woman:
No


Man:
Where's your Ferrari?

I am listening to my scanner and it just said that the suspects are armed with "Chair legs" !

Originally Posted by 32t

I am listening to my scanner and it just said that the suspects are armed with "Chair legs" !

was it this guy?

Originally Posted by Lumberjohn

was it this guy?

They didn't mention an eye patch but......

I have decided not to wear a black hat and dark pants. It seems that 60% of the time that is the description of the suspect. 30% of the rest are Female. Lime Green pants should keep me from being bothered.

As one that's very proud to call himself just an old redneck country boy I proudly post this;

Just in from a friend of my mother, they were in High School back in the late 40's and very early 50's. Mom's gone but her friend is still going.

His name was Bubba, he was from Mississippi and he needed a loan.

So, he walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan Officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to
Paris for an International Redneck Festival for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bank.

The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Redneck handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The Redneck produced the title and everything checked out.
The loan officer agreed to hold he car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.

Later, the bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Redneck from the south for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank's private underground garage and parked it.

Two weeks later, the Redneck returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07.

The loan officer said, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out on Dunn & Bradstreet and found that you are distinguished alumni from Ole Miss University, a highly sophisticated investor and multi-millionaire with real estate and financial interests all over the world. Your investments include a large number of wind turbines around Sweetwater, Texas. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The good 'ole boy replied, "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?"

His name was BUBBA....Keep an eye on those southern boys! Just because we talk different doesn't mean we are stupid.

Yes,,, right outside of Duncan Donuts this morning, opened the car to get in, had my hands full of donuts & ice coffee,,, the thugs sprang from the bushes & tried to take my donuts,,,



One tried to look like he was not interested, as the other one kept a look out for cops,,,



,,,,,,,,,,,I flashed the Glock & they hauled duck,,,,,,,,,,,,,

is that a Muscovy?

Originally Posted by Hirlau

Yes,,, right outside of Duncan Donuts this morning, opened the car to get in, had my hands full of donuts & ice coffee,,, the thugs sprang from the bushes & tried to take my donuts,,,

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