Clean jokes

I love this thread. I just wish I knew some clean jokes!

What did the man say after a book fell on his head?

I've only got my shelf to blame.

What did Custer say at the Little Big Horn batttle?

These Sioux’s are killing me!

A boy fell in the mud... oh wait sorry that's a dirty joke!

And it was also my grandmother favourite joke. A boy or a white horse were always the subject.

Apparently, you can't use "Beef Stew" as a password. It's not Stroganoff!

An excaped convict from London decided to hide away in Big Ben for the night. He fell asleep and plunged head first through the clock tower to his death. The local residents were awoken by a faint "ding" from the tower at about 3.15 am.
In the morning, a local constable found the body and asked the gathering crowd "Does anyone recognize this man?"
A voice from the back of the crowd replied "His face rings a bell"...

My wife is always offended when she gets in our new car. There's a sign on the dashboard that lights up and says "Passenger airbag on".

Blind guy with his service dog walks into the local Wal-Mart.
He grabs his dog by the tail and starts twirling him above his head.
An employee asks the man if he needs help.
He replies:
"No thank you. I'm just looking around."

Why has the Norwegian Navy put barcodes on all the ships?

So when they return to port they can Scandinavian