Thread: Quip Of The Day

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy"

Originally Posted by slim6596

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy"

This joke is so old I think Noah was the first to hear it, hang your head in shame...lol

Heard from a former employee " under-staffed employees due to under-handed management! "

Richard

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
-- Albert Einstein

Originally Posted by dimab

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
-- Albert Einstein

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/...say/504692001/

Originally Posted by cudarunner

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/...say/504692001/

Yes, I know, but doesn't this quote prove itself

" BARTON'S AMENDMENT TO MURPHY'S LAW: Even if it can't, it might. "

Not sure if it counts as a "quip", but I was watching an old movie years ago (the movie was from the 50s I think). A group of people were at a dinner/night club. The odd man out was asked why he didn't have a date...

"What's wrong, Johnny? Couldn't get a date?"
"You kiddin'? I got broads sittin at home, tearin their hair out over me."
"Yeah? Why didn't you bring one tonight?"

"....nah. I'm tired of bald headed dames."

From a book I read recently,

"What would you like on your vegetarian pizza?"

"Dead pigs and dead cows."

Stupidity, like virtue, is its own reward.