Thread: Quip Of The Day

Originally Posted by ReardenSteel

I just shared that one with my wife and she loved it.

You obviously caught her at the right time of the…never mind.

I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States.  The only thing is..   I could be just as proud for half the money.      --Arthur Godfrey


rs,
Tack

After twelve years of therapy, my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes.  He said, "No hablo ingles."


rs,
Tack

You then in turn submit a bill to the therapist fovthe past twelve years and sue for mental stress... The American way :-)

Originally Posted by Tack

After twelve years of therapy, my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes.* He said, "No hablo ingles."


rs,
Tack

So, at weekend dinner, my bride was talking about how, now that she is getting up in age, she likes to play the Crazy Old Lady card, and starts to raise her voice, when these “kids” at the store give her a hard time, about one thing or another. She is the Queen of the Sale and slightest Discount, knows how to work the system and does it, for sport.

My son says, “It’s a good thing you don’t have a house with a front porch.

My daughter asks,” Why?”

My son says, “Because, Mom would be sitting out front, in a rocking chair, with your Citori on her lap, yelling at the kids, to get off her lawn and drawing a bead on anyone that drove by, while smoking a corn cob pipe.”

My wife says “See, you don’t know what you’re talking about, you don’t know me at all… I don’t smoke”.

I'm making a list of reasons to move to Switzerland. The flag is a big plus.


rs,
Tack

I don't need life - I'm high on drugs.

Originally Posted by Phrank

I don't need life - I'm high on drugs.

Good One!

Pharmscuticles? Or recreationale? But I suppose this day and ave the are the same

Originally Posted by Phrank

I don't need life - I'm high on drugs.

Originally Posted by whoever

Pharmscuticles? Or recreationale? But I suppose this day and ave the are the same

It’s a damn poor mind that can only think of one way to spell a word.       --Andrew Jackson


rs,
Tack