Thread: Quip Of The Day

An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a “Thanks for flying our airline.” He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, “Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?” “Why, no Ma’am,” said the pilot. “What is it?” The little old lady said, “Did we land, or were we shot down?”

If you stick your head in the sand, one thing is for sure: you're gonna get your rear kicked.

Old age and treachery will beat youth and skill every time.
- seen on a coffee cup

The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.
- Oscar Wilde

This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog–we laughed a lot.

…………………

“It eats me alive, the kilt. My legs get purple. My willy gets purple.”

Billy Connolly on the aspect of being Scottish.

Covid19, Social Distancing!

I miss when we stayed away from people just because we didn't like them.

Originally Posted by STF

Covid19, Social Distancing!

I miss when we stayed away from people just because we didn't like them.

Many years ago when the guy who would become one of my closest friends (Ski) moved to Milton Freewater to be an assistant manager for Safeway, he got a house that was right beside the Safeway, in fact he could walk out his back door into the Safeway area where the trucks unloaded.

He had three small boys. The next door neighbor (Frank) immediately put up a privacy fence. Ski offered to pay half of the cost but the neighbor said no. Frank and his wife would have nothing to do with Ski or his family, not even answer to a simple hello from him, his wife or kids.

That was about 40 years ago. Since then Ski has purchased a different house but the new house is just across the side street from Frank. One of his son's bought the house Ski originally moved into.

Ski said that a couple of years ago Frank was out working in his yard and he walked over and asked him why he didn't like him. Frank replied "I just don't".

If Frank and his wife have children they never come to visit, they never have company. They have what I feel is a very sad life. What is life without friends?

Originally Posted by cudarunner

...What is life without friends?

Quiet. Plus all your money stays in your pocket, all your beer stays in your refrigerator and all your food stays on your shelf unless you do something with it....or was that the answer to, "what is life without roommates?"