Thread: Quip Of The Day

"Never underestimate the ability of Internet users to ignore relevant information in their quest for answers." --Dan Kehn

Originally Posted by Geezer

"Never underestimate the ability of Internet users to ignore relevant information in their quest for answers." --Dan Kehn

Very pertinent rich

"Did you sleep good?" "No, I made a few mistakes." (Steven Wright)

"Be true to your teeth and they won't be false to you."

Soupy Sales

Originally Posted by mrsell63

"Be true to your teeth and they won't be false to you."
Soupy Sales

"China Clippers?"
~Richard

"At my age, each new day is a gift! Howsomever, who was the giver is sometimes a question!"(me)
~Richard

TWO NUNS WERE SHOPPING AT A 7-11 STORE. AS THEY
PASSED BY THE BEER COOLER, ONE NUN SAID TO THE OTHER,

" WOULDN'T A NICE COOL BEER OR TWO TASTE WONDERFUL
ON A HOT SUMMER EVENING?

THE SECOND NUN ANSWERED, "INDEED IT WOULD, SISTER,
BUT I WOULD NOT FEEL COMFORTABLE BUYING BEER,
SINCE I AM CERTAIN IT WOULD CAUSE A SCENE
AT THE CHECKOUT STAND."

"I CAN HANDLE THAT WITHOUT A PROBLEM"
THE OTHER NUN REPLIED, AND SHE PICKED UP A
SIX-PACK AND HEADED FOR THE CHECK-OUT.

THE CASHIER HAD A SURPRISED LOOK ON HIS FACE
WHEN THE TWO NUNS ARRIVED WITH A SIX-PACK OF BEER.

"WE USE BEER FOR WASHING OUR HAIR" THE NUN SAID,
"BACK AT OUR NUNNERY, WE CALL IT CATHOLIC SHAMPOO.

WITHOUT BLINKING AN EYE, THE CASHIER REACHED UNDER
THE COUNTER, PULLED OUT A PACKAGE OF PRETZEL STICKS,
AND PLACED THEM IN THE BAG WITH THE BEER.
HE THEN LOOKED THE NUN STRAIGHT IN THE EYE,
SMILED, AND SAID:

"THE CURLERS ARE ON THE HOUSE."

Two cannibals chowing down on a clown. One turns to the other and says "does this taste funny to you?"

It's a fact: the average guy thinks about sex every tits seconds.

Originally Posted by Phrank

It's a fact: the average guy thinks about sex every tits seconds.

Must be hard-on him.