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Thread: Clean jokes

  1. #461
    JP5
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    Quote Originally Posted by holli4pirating View Post
    Did you hear about the T-rex that was arrested for firearms sales? He was a small arms dealer.
    Reminds me of scene in Meet the Robinsons where the T-Rex can't reach the boy.

    Villain : What's wrong? Why aren't you seizing the boy?!

    T-Rex : I've got a big head and little arms. I'm not sure how well this plan was thought out....
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    - Joshua

  2. #462
    'with that said' cudarunner's Avatar
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    Our house is as Neil left it- an Aladdinís cave of 'stuff'.

    Kim X

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    Geezer (04-14-2019)

  4. #463
    Senior Member blabbermouth Geezer's Avatar
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    Boy at zoo:
    Mommy, mommy, that big animal is picking cabbages with its tail. .. . And you won't believe where it's putting them!
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    Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
    - Oscar Wilde

  5. #464
    Senior Member blabbermouth Haroldg48's Avatar
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    "I grew up all my life believing I was Irish, but thanks to Ancestry.com, I now know I’m just a drunk."
    Just call me Harold
    ---------------------------
    A bad day at the beach is better than a good day at work!

  6. #465
    'with that said' cudarunner's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haroldg48 View Post
    "I grew up all my life believing I was Irish, but thanks to Ancestry.com, I now know Iím just a drunk."
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    Our house is as Neil left it- an Aladdinís cave of 'stuff'.

    Kim X

  7. #466
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    What type of socks do pirates wear? Arrrgyle socks

    Why did the banana go to the doctor? He wasn't peeling well.

    Two mushrooms walk into a bar. One says to the bartender give me a double shot of your best vodka. The bartender looks down his nose at then and says in a condescending manner. We don't serve your kind here. The second mushroom pipes up and says why not we're fun guys!

    "Rice is good when you're hungry and want 2,000 of something" Mitch Hedberg
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    There is no such thing a too much horsepower.

  8. #467
    The Hurdy Gurdy Man thebigspendur's Avatar
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    Why did the sesame seed refuse to leave the casino?




    He was on a roll.
    No matter how many men you kill you can't kill your successor-Emperor Nero

  9. #468
    Senior Member tintin's Avatar
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    My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

  10. #469
    Senior Member tintin's Avatar
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    If a tree falls in the forest and nobody hears, that means that my illegal logging business is a success!
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  11. #470
    JP5
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    Quote Originally Posted by tintin View Post
    My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.
    Haha. They make a difference.

    HELP A THIEF!
    &
    HELP, A THIEF!
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    - Joshua

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